When friends or family visit, those with no particular connection with traditional music, and they ask you to "play something."
Are you happy to play, but more to the point, what do you play? Would it make a difference if you know they are into, say, classical music, or jazz, or whatever?
On the other hand, when we go visiting friends or family, I expect to be allowed to b*gger off down the garden or in the other lounge (at the rich ones) and play a tune (alone or with anyone else who wishes to join me), if they want to talk about things of no interest to me like football, soaps, where to go this afternoon, bird flu, the beginning of world war 3, etc.
If I'm not allowed I scream and scream and scream until I am sick. Or I hold my breath until I die.
When I was young and learning classical violin, my father used to make me play for him every Sunday - a regular torture session - for both of us I suspect!!
Now I'm playing what I want, how I want, I will usually oblige friends/family who ask but keep it very short!! Better to be asked for more than to have bored them senseless!!
I usually won't diappear and play unless visitors outstay their welcome. If guests stay for days, I will play my electric fiddle early in the mornings with in-ear monitoring so not to disturb anyone!
Showaddy - how many times have you died so far!!
Yep, play old-time fiddle or classical piano for them. It seems to be a regular occurrence . . . That's mostly for family though, of course most of my friends are classical pianists so they hear me for classes and stuff although they haven't heard me play fiddle . . .
When it comes to what tune to play (fiddle) my first choice would often be a version of Cuckoo's Nest. The tune has a nice shape to it, it changes key (to keep the classical types happy,) being not too fast it hopefully reduces the "all sound the same" issue, I'm used to playing it solo in public, and I like it!
Music is for sharing, of course I play for them, and sometimes wish they would ask more. I also try to play and sing for my granddaughter, who is too young to ask, but is absolutely riveted whenever I play something for her (although her mind does wanted pretty quick--her attention span doesn't last much past one tune, once through).
Danny Boy seems to be the perennial request from family. I used to hate playing it, but at some point I think it's better for the soul to just give up the struggle and try and enjoy it!
My wife's family don't know anyone who plays music, and they have that American thing about stardom and media and all... 'People who play are stars and only stars play...'
So when we began playing lots of sessions and gigging I guess they thought we were lying about playing a lot.
So at a family reunion we brought fiddler TJ along and after the big meal we sat out in the back yard and had some tunes, blew 'em away. Now we -are- big stars to the fam'! It's a hoot.
But we aren't asked to play when we go visiting, I think they know that if we want to have a tune we will, and there'd be no stopping us... <GGG>
There are times, no longer among the family, but when others are very far from any experience of people playing music as a regular part of their lives, when asking is a sort of condescension. Then we think twice... Sometimes we'll play to reply in kind <G>, sometimes we'll decline the invitation.
I like Cuckoo's Nest, too (leaving myself open to the considerable metaphorical wit that inhabits this forum), but I don't know a version that changes key.
Cuckoo's Nest - Of the versions on this site the 15th Jan 2004 is closest, but I don't play a B-music as shown. Just something like the A and C.
I'm probably wrong in saying it changes key, just a few accidentals along the way.
Play something simple and melodic, if you like them and want to impress - Planxty Irwin or something obvious like that.
Play the Concertina Reel, very fast, about ten times, if you don't.
I just recently began to be able to get through the Concertina Reel without errors as the latest step in my prolonged efforts to gain some skill on the button box. Thanks Ottery for reminding me where that accomplishment falls on the scale of musical success!
Steve's scenario is about right: the odd American thing (that you can only play an instrument in public if you are a professional musician or other bona fide 'expert') is very well entrenched in the Midwest, where my family lives. My husband and I always drag instruments along and have a few tunes when we stay at relatives' houses; but no one usually asks us to play (we're not THAT bad!). It's sort of like being gay; our families accept that we are that way, but don't discuss it in public.
But I have done the play at a party thing, and the other guests just couldn't believe that adults could do such a thing and have fun. And all without 'sheet music!!!!. May have made some recruits that evening...
The shock and delight that so many people experience when exposed to practicing folk musicians is a testament to the damage done by packaged commercial entertainment.
Last summer, my wife and I and a friend were loitering on our little town square and, as we usually do when we’re together, we harmonized a few songs. Some people stopped to listen and one couple said they had heard “that kind of music” in recordings, but it was “amazing” to encounter it in real life. Not that *we* were amazing, but that the experience was amazing to them. It’s great to be appreciated, but kinda sad that it’s a strange experience for so many people.
I usually refuse to play for them unless they are willing to go to a session with me. This however can backfire as having taken my dad and my partner's dad to sessions, they insist on talking very loudly through anything but songs. Performing in your living room for people with no interest in the music seems pointless to me.
My dad used to say he'd never believe I could play the whistle until I could play Phil the Fluter's Ball.
I only heard it a few years ago, long after my dad was dead and I'd chucked the whistle. I think I suspected it was a bit "stage irish" so didn't go looking for it at the time.
I could've made my dad a bit happy by learning that tune, giving him a benchmark to see I wasn't noodling my life away, and something to say "Play us a tune, Bren" for (see, he's not noodling his life away) when the rellies came round.
I think that Steve and Bob and batlady's comments are exactly right ( except the bit about the Cuckoo's Nest ). I actually think we are performing a community service, reminding people that "ordinairy folk" can actually make ( good ) music, and without requiring large sums of money ( though I'd never turn any down ).
I remember my old uncle was learning the Piano accordion,slowly, and would demonstrate it, and was always curious to hear how I was getting on with my guitar, etc, and I'm sorry that I didn't pay him more mind when he was alive because it's this sort of encouragement that we need to give to everyone, also helpful and non-corrosive criticism.
And playing for the relatives is a useful way of getting over early stage-fright.
i am used to be asked to "play somthing" - i didn't like that at first place but now it's fun. all the compliments...
i often choose something quick and lively, that seems to grab the audience best (apart from christmas eve of course - then a slow tune fits better)
Not really a problem here - when we have [my wife's family] family get togethers at my house I usually invite a few musicians over and we rattle them out our usual session tunes.
Also get the Mother in law to sing a song or two - even though it's of the 'Old Rusty Bridge by the MIll' variety. She enjoys singing it and we give her her dues.
Our kids are also encouraged to join in or do a turn - the wee whistler is usually more than up for it and our youngest [the house terrorist] usually dances her wee heart out around the room. Much to the delight and enjoyment of the company.
I would never 'make' them do it but ensure they are invited to be part of the team.
When the Carson's get together it usually a heady mix of whiskey, banter, argument, song and tunes and almost always into the wee small hours.
Depends on the people - since I got a smaller harp I've been taking it with me everywhere I go and just take it out at some point if it fits in. My experience is people like to hear things that they're familiar with, so if they're not into trad, it means 'Danny Boy' or something like that - so I'm making a point of knowing a few like that - but then I'll play an assortment of carolan and dance tunes. And it it's really comfortable they'll start talking and I'm just playing off to the side. And it's great to see the kids' interest in the instrument - they want to try it.
When friends or family come visiting....
When friends or family come visiting....
When friends or family visit, those with no particular connection with traditional music, and they ask you to "play something."
Are you happy to play, but more to the point, what do you play? Would it make a difference if you know they are into, say, classical music, or jazz, or whatever?
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by TomB-R
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
They don't actually ask me to play anything, but that doesn't stop me, especially when it's time for them to think about going home!
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by RichardB
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I hate being asked to "play something".
On the other hand, when we go visiting friends or family, I expect to be allowed to b*gger off down the garden or in the other lounge (at the rich ones) and play a tune (alone or with anyone else who wishes to join me), if they want to talk about things of no interest to me like football, soaps, where to go this afternoon, bird flu, the beginning of world war 3, etc.
If I'm not allowed I scream and scream and scream until I am sick. Or I hold my breath until I die.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by showaddydadito
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
When I was young and learning classical violin, my father used to make me play for him every Sunday - a regular torture session - for both of us I suspect!!
Now I'm playing what I want, how I want, I will usually oblige friends/family who ask but keep it very short!! Better to be asked for more than to have bored them senseless!!
I usually won't diappear and play unless visitors outstay their welcome. If guests stay for days, I will play my electric fiddle early in the mornings with in-ear monitoring so not to disturb anyone!
Showaddy - how many times have you died so far!!
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Tarrantella
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Yep, play old-time fiddle or classical piano for them. It seems to be a regular occurrence . . . That's mostly for family though, of course most of my friends are classical pianists so they hear me for classes and stuff although they haven't heard me play fiddle . . .
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by musicfan
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
They always give in.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by showaddydadito
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
When it comes to what tune to play (fiddle) my first choice would often be a version of Cuckoo's Nest. The tune has a nice shape to it, it changes key (to keep the classical types happy,) being not too fast it hopefully reduces the "all sound the same" issue, I'm used to playing it solo in public, and I like it!
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by TomB-R
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
My friends and family don't know I play anything outside scrabble. Please don't tell them.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by EastPole
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Music is for sharing, of course I play for them, and sometimes wish they would ask more. I also try to play and sing for my granddaughter, who is too young to ask, but is absolutely riveted whenever I play something for her (although her mind does wanted pretty quick--her attention span doesn't last much past one tune, once through).
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by AlBrown
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
This is one great advantage of being an accompanist. I only get asked to play by someone else who has been asked to play and needs (moral) support.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Donough
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Danny Boy seems to be the perennial request from family. I used to hate playing it, but at some point I think it's better for the soul to just give up the struggle and try and enjoy it!
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by hossboss
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
My wife's family don't know anyone who plays music, and they have that American thing about stardom and media and all... 'People who play are stars and only stars play...'
So when we began playing lots of sessions and gigging I guess they thought we were lying about playing a lot.
So at a family reunion we brought fiddler TJ along and after the big meal we sat out in the back yard and had some tunes, blew 'em away. Now we -are- big stars to the fam'! It's a hoot.
But we aren't asked to play when we go visiting, I think they know that if we want to have a tune we will, and there'd be no stopping us... <GGG>
There are times, no longer among the family, but when others are very far from any experience of people playing music as a regular part of their lives, when asking is a sort of condescension. Then we think twice... Sometimes we'll play to reply in kind <G>, sometimes we'll decline the invitation.
stv
http://cdbaby.com/Culchies
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by stv culchie
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I like Cuckoo's Nest, too (leaving myself open to the considerable metaphorical wit that inhabits this forum), but I don't know a version that changes key.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Bob himself
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Cuckoo's Nest - Of the versions on this site the 15th Jan 2004 is closest, but I don't play a B-music as shown. Just something like the A and C.
I'm probably wrong in saying it changes key, just a few accidentals along the way.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by TomB-R
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
It’s a great tune. Or tune family, maybe. How many tunes are almost Cuckoo’s Nest?
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Bob himself
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Play something simple and melodic, if you like them and want to impress - Planxty Irwin or something obvious like that.
Play the Concertina Reel, very fast, about ten times, if you don't.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Ottery
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I just recently began to be able to get through the Concertina Reel without errors as the latest step in my prolonged efforts to gain some skill on the button box. Thanks Ottery for reminding me where that accomplishment falls on the scale of musical success!
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by AlBrown
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Steve's scenario is about right: the odd American thing (that you can only play an instrument in public if you are a professional musician or other bona fide 'expert') is very well entrenched in the Midwest, where my family lives. My husband and I always drag instruments along and have a few tunes when we stay at relatives' houses; but no one usually asks us to play (we're not THAT bad!). It's sort of like being gay; our families accept that we are that way, but don't discuss it in public.
But I have done the play at a party thing, and the other guests just couldn't believe that adults could do such a thing and have fun. And all without 'sheet music!!!!. May have made some recruits that evening...
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Batlady
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
The shock and delight that so many people experience when exposed to practicing folk musicians is a testament to the damage done by packaged commercial entertainment.
Last summer, my wife and I and a friend were loitering on our little town square and, as we usually do when we’re together, we harmonized a few songs. Some people stopped to listen and one couple said they had heard “that kind of music” in recordings, but it was “amazing” to encounter it in real life. Not that *we* were amazing, but that the experience was amazing to them. It’s great to be appreciated, but kinda sad that it’s a strange experience for so many people.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Bob himself
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
lol @ "practising folk musicians"
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Q
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I wonder what I meant by that.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by Bob himself
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I usually refuse to play for them unless they are willing to go to a session with me. This however can backfire as having taken my dad and my partner's dad to sessions, they insist on talking very loudly through anything but songs. Performing in your living room for people with no interest in the music seems pointless to me.
# Posted on February 2nd 2006 by tlittlewazzock
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
My dad used to say he'd never believe I could play the whistle until I could play Phil the Fluter's Ball.
I only heard it a few years ago, long after my dad was dead and I'd chucked the whistle. I think I suspected it was a bit "stage irish" so didn't go looking for it at the time.
I could've made my dad a bit happy by learning that tune, giving him a benchmark to see I wasn't noodling my life away, and something to say "Play us a tune, Bren" for (see, he's not noodling his life away) when the rellies came round.
Let that be a lesson to you all.
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by Bren
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
TARRANTELLA:
"I usually won't diappear..." Is this a reference to incontinence? If so, I thought you would have called it a nappy.
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by oldstrings
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
I think that Steve and Bob and batlady's comments are exactly right ( except the bit about the Cuckoo's Nest ). I actually think we are performing a community service, reminding people that "ordinairy folk" can actually make ( good ) music, and without requiring large sums of money ( though I'd never turn any down ).
I remember my old uncle was learning the Piano accordion,slowly, and would demonstrate it, and was always curious to hear how I was getting on with my guitar, etc, and I'm sorry that I didn't pay him more mind when he was alive because it's this sort of encouragement that we need to give to everyone, also helpful and non-corrosive criticism.
And playing for the relatives is a useful way of getting over early stage-fright.
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by Guernsey Pete
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Oddly enough, in most of these midwestern environs, a block or two away are folks playing church music or bluegrass, just like we play Irish! LOL!!
But there do seem to be great gaps in the musical consciousness ... <GG>
stv
http://cdbaby.com/Culchies
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by stv culchie
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
i am used to be asked to "play somthing" - i didn't like that at first place but now it's fun. all the compliments...
i often choose something quick and lively, that seems to grab the audience best (apart from christmas eve of course - then a slow tune fits better)
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by mairie
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Not really a problem here - when we have [my wife's family] family get togethers at my house I usually invite a few musicians over and we rattle them out our usual session tunes.
Also get the Mother in law to sing a song or two - even though it's of the 'Old Rusty Bridge by the MIll' variety. She enjoys singing it and we give her her dues.
Our kids are also encouraged to join in or do a turn - the wee whistler is usually more than up for it and our youngest [the house terrorist] usually dances her wee heart out around the room. Much to the delight and enjoyment of the company.
I would never 'make' them do it but ensure they are invited to be part of the team.
When the Carson's get together it usually a heady mix of whiskey, banter, argument, song and tunes and almost always into the wee small hours.
# Posted on February 3rd 2006 by breandan
Re: When friends or family come visiting....
Depends on the people - since I got a smaller harp I've been taking it with me everywhere I go and just take it out at some point if it fits in. My experience is people like to hear things that they're familiar with, so if they're not into trad, it means 'Danny Boy' or something like that - so I'm making a point of knowing a few like that - but then I'll play an assortment of carolan and dance tunes. And it it's really comfortable they'll start talking and I'm just playing off to the side. And it's great to see the kids' interest in the instrument - they want to try it.
# Posted on February 7th 2006 by drinharp