Inspired by the "...music be the food of love" thread, I propose a new line of nonsense. I don't know where or when Tom Swifties, originated, and I'm not sure who the original Tom Swift character was, but the idea is that Tom says things in a manner befitting his words:
"It's a slow tune," Tom said airily.
"I need another pint," Tom said dryly.
"Do you get it?" Tom asked pointedly.
There must be hundreds of possibilities involving ITM. Some of them are probably even clean. Care for a session, I ask playfully?
“No, no, no! I will NOT play Dowd’s Number 9,” said Tom in passable German.
“The first three notes of Egan’s Polka are simply fab,” said Tom.
“We’ve already played The Banshee!” wailed Tom.
“Do we HAVE to play Saddle the Pony?” asked Tom hoarsely.
“That setting for The Crib of Perches is different from the one I usually play,” carped Tom.
ITM Tom Swifties?
ITM Tom Swifties?
Inspired by the "...music be the food of love" thread, I propose a new line of nonsense. I don't know where or when Tom Swifties, originated, and I'm not sure who the original Tom Swift character was, but the idea is that Tom says things in a manner befitting his words:
"It's a slow tune," Tom said airily.
"I need another pint," Tom said dryly.
"Do you get it?" Tom asked pointedly.
There must be hundreds of possibilities involving ITM. Some of them are probably even clean. Care for a session, I ask playfully?
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by woman of the house
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"The pipes are lovely tonight," Tom droned.
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by John Culhane
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"It certainly takes pluck to play mandolin in this session," Tom fretted.
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by ed veras
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Jaysus, that bhoy can play the bodhran, boomed Tom.
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by snorre
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Would you stop playing that threepenny bit", Tom bellowed.
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by Ian Stevenson
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"My bagpipe's leaking", hissed Tom
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by Janek
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I've swallowed my whistle." Tom gulped.
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by LowProfile
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
I can't think of any clean ones!
# Posted on August 6th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"So give us an un-clean one," Tom said washfully!
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by John Culhane
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Now THIS is a real Irish flute!" Tom said woodenly.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by Char B
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I can't think of any clean ones," Tom said dirtily.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by musicfan
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Oh, I'm going out of tune again!" Tom harped
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by Char B
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Don't tell me that tune was in 4/4?" Tom reeled.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by Jeremy
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"That's a nice pun, jim troy. As smooth as a fiddle player's phrasing," Tom slurred.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by John Culhane
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I just love 'Riverdance'" said Tom flatly.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by darinkelly
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm bringing my e-flat whistle to the session tonight," Tom screeched.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by darinkelly
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"D'ya mind if Rosie sings us a song?" Tom warbled.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by darinkelly
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
" Let's play 'Saddle the Pony','' Tom yelled hoarsely.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by ∅
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
" Damn, that string´s gone again" snapped Tom.
"That fiddle´s way out of tune " said Tom sharply.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by murfbox
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I just learned to play 'The Yellow Cow,'" uttered Tom.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by sts
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm going to use the harp tonight. " Tom pluckly said.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by jrathbun
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
'I'm off to the wedding' Tom said hastily.
'I'm looking for some geese' said Tom as he bogged off.
'Where's that Tom got to?' roared Mary.
'I'm going to watch Sky' said Tom for a lark.
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by breandan
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Oh aargh, you're all too much for me! LOL
# Posted on August 7th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm going to play with some beginner fiddlers" squeaked Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Toresica
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm finished," Tom said softly.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by woman of the house
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Never mind the shaky start, keep playing", egged Tom.
"Aaah... t'was a grand session until the old tree fell on the pub", pined Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by GraemeO
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I play each tune 3 times", echoed Tom
"Don't talk while you're playing" rapped Tom
"That was the Abbey Reel" chanted Tom.
"Tom, your playing really sucks", Tom was left speechless.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Donough
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"You could've Dunmore Lasses," Tom squacked at the Wise Maid and the Maid of Mt. Cisco who were hired to clean the pub after Last Night's Fun.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by John Culhane
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"If only Blind Mary were here..... " lamented Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by cabers
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"That reel must be 'the Looking Glass'", observed Tom.
"Shall we play 'the Road to Lisdoonvarna", ventured Tom.
"Behind the Haystack?", suggested Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"That tune is commonly called 'the New Policeman'", alleged Tom
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
“No, no, no! I will NOT play Dowd’s Number 9,” said Tom in passable German.
“The first three notes of Egan’s Polka are simply fab,” said Tom.
“We’ve already played The Banshee!” wailed Tom.
“Do we HAVE to play Saddle the Pony?” asked Tom hoarsely.
“That setting for The Crib of Perches is different from the one I usually play,” carped Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by fidkid
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Let's play 'The Glass of Beer." belched Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
“I’ll nevermore play The Raven through the Bog!”, quoth Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Bob himself
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
“I just love An Phis Fhliuch!” ejaculated Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by fidkid
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Your flute is draining onto my shoe", Tom spouted.
"I seem to have ruptured my bellows", burst Tom.
"There goes another string", said Tom with his Southern twang.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
“The Pope’s Toe shall not be played tonight”, Tom pontificated.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Bob himself
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
“Playing The Bucks that fast makes my head spin”, said Tom, reeling.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Bob himself
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Okay, fidkid, if we all get after-school detention, it's your fault!
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Bob himself
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
You’re right, Bob. It was wrong of me to repeat Laitch’s offering. Sorry, Laitch!
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by fidkid
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
heh, yeah... that's what Bob himself was referring to, I'm sure
"Let's play 'Jenny's Wedding'", proposed Tom
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Go back to work, you!
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm tired of 'Old Hag, You Have Killed Me'", bitched Pete... Ummm I mean Tom
(It's a *joke*, ok?)
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"We'll play 'Bang your Frog on the Sofa' you ****" - said Tom, couching and insult.
"Let me to the sofa! This wooden barstool gives me a pain in some places " - ass-erted Tom
"Let's play 'Drag her Round the Road' ", pushed Tom.
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Janek
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
You WAIT til you get home, Pete! *smirk*
# Posted on August 8th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Heh, well that pretty well put a damper on THAT thread!
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Let's play, 'The Dogs Among the Bushes.'" Tom barked.
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Look, the dogs are chasing the ' Bird in the Bush' ", Tom tittered.
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by cabers
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Isn't "The Bird in the Bush" really "Dan Quayle's Reel?" Tom said stupidly.
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
Tom chimed in; "I only play the WIRE Strung Harp"
No, let's don't play "Saddle the Pony", Tom neighed.
Can we play "Riding a Mule" ? Tom asrked innocently.
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Owell Mabee
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Will this ever end ?" said Tom finally!!
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Donough
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I'm Waiting for You." Tom said patiently.
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Was that God playing that fiddle?", Tom asked frankly
# Posted on August 9th 2005 by Reverend
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"Every Good Boy Deserves Fun" noted Tom, as he FACEd the music.
# Posted on August 10th 2005 by Rudall the time
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
God? ... a fiddle player? Not down here in Georgia anyway. said Tom with a devilish grin.
# Posted on August 10th 2005 by cabers
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"That's The Cat that Ate the Candle," Tom purred.
# Posted on August 10th 2005 by woman of the house
Re: ITM Tom Swifties?
"I know one called 'The Cow That Ate the Blanket.'" Tom regurgitated.
# Posted on August 10th 2005 by Phantom Button