I've been talked into taking the kids to a Gamelan workshop this afternoon, and we've been given some instructions about respect for the instruments:
RESPECT FOR THE GAMELAN
The Javanese treat their musical instruments with immense respect, behaving towards them as they would other people. Consequently,
(1) We always take our shoes off before entering the gamelan space. (The Javanese always remove their shoes when entering someone's home.)
(2) We NEVER EVER step over an instrument. (To step over a person is considered very rude in Java.)
(3) We always play the gamelan sitting on the floor, cross-legged or kneeling, if at all possible. (The Javanese will never place themselves higher than a person they respect.)
(4) We behave with dignity in the presence of the gamelan. We do not run, or scream, or slouch, or lie down.
I think respect is sorely lacking in sessions in these sad times (particularly towards very bad fiddle players) and and I invite suggestions for some good rules.
Never step over the banjo player?
Behave with dignity when asked to play Danny Boy?
Never drip your flute dribblings into the Guinness?
Well, that would explain why although my intonation is completely perfect at all times the notes coming out of the fiddle are horribly out of tune - it's possessed by a bodhran player. Is there a good way to exorcise bodhran player ghosts?
Sit beside a very loud and insensitive piano-accordion player - the bodhran player ghost is sure to be enticed out of you by such a kindred spirit. Then you can deal with them both by deftly poking your bow through the drum and puncturing the bellows of the accordion!
Sugary substance are not good for either woodwind or plucrum instruments. Would you drink sugary substances around your instrument (beer in my case), which can jepordize the intergrity of your instrument?
Keeping with the gamelan theory of respect here, then we need "male" and "female" instruments. The males must be tuned slightly higher than standard pitch, and the females slightly lower. (That might explain the cacophony to be found in sessions from time to time).
It is quite disrespectful for a female to play a male instrument (hmmm, maybe I should have worded that differently?) The hard part... er... the difficult part is figuring out which instruments should be male and which female...
'which instruments should be male and which female'
That's easy.
Male: Flute, (long rigid thing with tendency to exude moisture from the end - often passed around and admired at sessions), All Strummed or Picked or bowed Instruments (Note the well practised vigorous right hand movement)
Female: Concertina, Accordion, Pipes (Require squeezing whilst wiggling fingers energetically. Pipes in particular inspire equal amounts of devotion and frustration)
In all seriousness, I usually think of the piano, harp and fiddle as feminine instruments, and the guitar, banjo and bodhran, as masculine instruments.
Oh man... passin' the ole flute around at a session sounds like a good way to catch a disease.
When I used to work in radio, we'd keep a can of Lysol Disinfectant spray around to spray on the microphone if the person on air before you had a cold.
You could keep a can around the session for when Ottery starts trying to pass his instrument around.
Latex gloves would help also. We could hand over the instruments to the C.S.I. lab to discover who murdered the tune. Pizza and instruments may be the worst match up, especially the type with the melty cheese strings that never let you separate the pieces.
I think it's a matter of honour around here that you say to someone, "Here try this", and pass them the flute you've been playing for the last hour, and they DON'T wipe the mouthpiece before playing it - and when you get it back you don't wipe it either. That's why we're so healthy and germ-resistant! The last time I had a day off work sick was nearly fifteen years ago (really).
If a beautiful girl said to me, "Mark, kiss me now, I can't wait..." I wouldn't squirt Lysol in her mouth first, would I?
Not that any beautiful girl would say that, but ....
Zina, every now and again you say something that truly illustrates the gulf between both sides of the Atlantic!
What the hell do you mean by a bleach bath? (let alone a mild one) - I thought a bleach bath was something you used when developing film ... ?
and how does it relate to anything written above?
LOL -- bleach -- it's a disinfectant. But you'd only use a mild one on skin. Extremely mild. Like, a couple of drops. And you'd never think of using it on a person anyway. Like...it was a joke, the kind that isn't nearly so funny when you explain it? *smirk*
I once asked, in the usual chitchat that goes on in a costume shop at a large theatre company, why there wasn't a word like "misogynist" only that meant a woman who doesn't like men. There was a short pause, and one of the cutters looked up and said, "maybe because that's a given?"
Respect
Respect
I've been talked into taking the kids to a Gamelan workshop this afternoon, and we've been given some instructions about respect for the instruments:
RESPECT FOR THE GAMELAN
The Javanese treat their musical instruments with immense respect, behaving towards them as they would other people. Consequently,
(1) We always take our shoes off before entering the gamelan space. (The Javanese always remove their shoes when entering someone's home.)
(2) We NEVER EVER step over an instrument. (To step over a person is considered very rude in Java.)
(3) We always play the gamelan sitting on the floor, cross-legged or kneeling, if at all possible. (The Javanese will never place themselves higher than a person they respect.)
(4) We behave with dignity in the presence of the gamelan. We do not run, or scream, or slouch, or lie down.
I think respect is sorely lacking in sessions in these sad times (particularly towards very bad fiddle players) and and I invite suggestions for some good rules.
Never step over the banjo player?
Behave with dignity when asked to play Danny Boy?
Never drip your flute dribblings into the Guinness?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by JerryH
Re: Respect
yeah respect is good.i wudnt step over an instrument or player (or drooble on anyone mind). But danny boy?
Also i think in Indonesia the gamelans are believed to be possessed by the ghosts of the Javanesianites ancestors (or their former bodhran players).
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by phiddle
Re: Respect
Well, that would explain why although my intonation is completely perfect at all times the notes coming out of the fiddle are horribly out of tune - it's possessed by a bodhran player. Is there a good way to exorcise bodhran player ghosts?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by JerryH
Re: Respect
JerryH: Yes, you have to put a bodhran on top of your head and bang it very very loudly.
How can we expect respect with the amount of alcohol that runs in our veins?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Beheader
Re: Respect
For a moment I thought this thread was about George Galloway.
What a relief.
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Johannes J
Re: Respect
Sit beside a very loud and insensitive piano-accordion player - the bodhran player ghost is sure to be enticed out of you by such a kindred spirit. Then you can deal with them both by deftly poking your bow through the drum and puncturing the bellows of the accordion!
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Ron P
Re: Respect
Heeeeey, I do the taking of the shoes thing!
Cheers,
Armand
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by fiddlinviolinin
Re: Respect
Viva Gorgeous George!
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Key Maniac Lad
Re: Respect
What about inviting Aretha Franklin in, to teach Respect? Now I'm going to have that song running thru my feeble mind all day!
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Agnes Nutter
Re: Respect
Sugary substance are not good for either woodwind or plucrum instruments. Would you drink sugary substances around your instrument (beer in my case), which can jepordize the intergrity of your instrument?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Pete D
Re: Respect
Keeping with the gamelan theory of respect here, then we need "male" and "female" instruments. The males must be tuned slightly higher than standard pitch, and the females slightly lower. (That might explain the cacophony to be found in sessions from time to time).
It is quite disrespectful for a female to play a male instrument (hmmm, maybe I should have worded that differently?)
The hard part... er... the difficult part is figuring out which instruments should be male and which female...
Pete
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Reverend
Re: Respect
Hey, nice Johnson you've got there, Pete...
I don't think it'll be too difficult.
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Zina Lee
and this is a family site, so getcher mind outta the gutter!
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
So you're implying that my *Octave Mandolin* would be a male instrument? Or did I miss the point completely?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Reverend
Re: Respect
Is that an octave mandolin in your pocket?
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: Respect
'which instruments should be male and which female'
That's easy.
Male: Flute, (long rigid thing with tendency to exude moisture from the end - often passed around and admired at sessions), All Strummed or Picked or bowed Instruments (Note the well practised vigorous right hand movement)
Female: Concertina, Accordion, Pipes (Require squeezing whilst wiggling fingers energetically. Pipes in particular inspire equal amounts of devotion and frustration)
Child: Bodhran (Requires regular beating)
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Ottery
Re: Respect
Ottery, you're so graphic!
In all seriousness, I usually think of the piano, harp and fiddle as feminine instruments, and the guitar, banjo and bodhran, as masculine instruments.
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Cath
Re: Respect
Mark, you pass yours around and let it be admired at sessions? I hope there's plenty of hot water and soap... ;)
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
Pipes are probably great if your bi
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Cath
Re: Respect
Oh man... passin' the ole flute around at a session sounds like a good way to catch a disease.
When I used to work in radio, we'd keep a can of Lysol Disinfectant spray around to spray on the microphone if the person on air before you had a cold.
You could keep a can around the session for when Ottery starts trying to pass his instrument around.
Pete
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Reverend
Re: Respect
Latex gloves would help also. We could hand over the instruments to the C.S.I. lab to discover who murdered the tune. Pizza and instruments may be the worst match up, especially the type with the melty cheese strings that never let you separate the pieces.
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by CeolCairdeas
Re: Respect
My Music Teacher used to say "If it has got frets, it's female"...
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Innocent Bystander
Re: Respect
I'm not sure I can quite bear to think about that, IB... ;)
# Posted on May 6th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
I think it's a matter of honour around here that you say to someone, "Here try this", and pass them the flute you've been playing for the last hour, and they DON'T wipe the mouthpiece before playing it - and when you get it back you don't wipe it either. That's why we're so healthy and germ-resistant! The last time I had a day off work sick was nearly fifteen years ago (really).
If a beautiful girl said to me, "Mark, kiss me now, I can't wait..." I wouldn't squirt Lysol in her mouth first, would I?
Not that any beautiful girl would say that, but ....
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Ottery
Re: Respect
Mild bleach baths, they're quite invigorating, really.
*smirk*
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
Zina, every now and again you say something that truly illustrates the gulf between both sides of the Atlantic!
What the hell do you mean by a bleach bath? (let alone a mild one) - I thought a bleach bath was something you used when developing film ... ?
and how does it relate to anything written above?
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Ottery
Re: Respect
LOL -- bleach -- it's a disinfectant. But you'd only use a mild one on skin. Extremely mild. Like, a couple of drops. And you'd never think of using it on a person anyway. Like...it was a joke, the kind that isn't nearly so funny when you explain it? *smirk*
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
So THAT'S why you're so white!
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Phantom Button
Re: Respect
LOL -- oh yeah...white...yeah...I'm white... *smirk*
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
So what are we discussing now? Safe Sessions?
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by John Culhane
Re: Respect
For misogynists the bodhran is female, to be kept in its place, sneered at, belittled and beaten.
For normal people it is just the same as other instruments, male or female.
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by bodhran bliss
Re: Respect
I once asked, in the usual chitchat that goes on in a costume shop at a large theatre company, why there wasn't a word like "misogynist" only that meant a woman who doesn't like men. There was a short pause, and one of the cutters looked up and said, "maybe because that's a given?"
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by Zina Lee
Re: Respect
I had a saxophone playing jazz friend that had a tight fitting case for his instrument. We would tease him about as his having "Safe Sax."
Zina: but didn't Michael Jackson invent that bleach bath thang? He became white and is now Albino.
# Posted on May 7th 2005 by CeolCairdeas
Re: Respect
Didn't Erasure do a track called 'Respect' ? - great song. (Don't know why that came into my mind just now!)
# Posted on November 29th 2006 by domnull