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the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
with thanks to chiddler, who provided this ;
I Thou shalt not come to the session to impresseth others with thine own talent for this is an abomination. The music shall be the star around which all musicians rotateth and not viceth-verseth! Attempts to make thine own star shine, shall surely lead thee into darkness!
II Thou shalt not forsake the beat. Thou shalt not speed up nor slow down accidentally when playing a tune for this shall be considered an abomination.
III Thou shalt arrange thyself in a small circle so that thou mayest see and mayest hear all the other musicians. Thou shalt listen with thine ears to the tunes and shall attempt to play in one accord with the group. Also, thou shalt lift up thine eyes to look about thee, lest there be some visual sign that someone endeavoureth to render unto thee.
IV Thou shalt play softly when someone lifteth his voice in song, when the guitar taketh a break, and when thou knowest not what thou art doing.
V Thou shalt play in tune! Tune thine instrument well and tune it often with thine electric tuner lest the sound that emanateth from thine instrument be unclean!
VI Thou shalt commence and cease playing each tune as one, so that the noise you make be a joyful noise and is not an abomination. Whensoever a musician sticketh forth his foot, as though he were afflicted with a cramp in the fatted calf, thou must complete the rest of that verse and then cease. Thou shalt stick out thine own foot or else lift up thy voice, crying, "This is it!" or "Last time!" if thou hast been the one to begin the tune and it hath been played sufficient times over. If the one who beginneth a tune, endeth it not by one of these signs, then the music goeth on in repetitious fashion until the listeners shall say, "Hark, it all soundeth the same!"
VII Thou shalt concentrate and shalt not confound the music by mixing up the "A" part with the "B" part. Most songs, but not all, proceedeth by the ancient law: "AABB". But, if thou sinneth in this regard or make any mistake that is unclean, thou mayest atone not by stopping, nay, but by reentering the tune at the proper place and playing on. Thy fellow musicians will support thee in this regard.
VIII Thou shalt be ever mindful of the key that the banjo is tuned in, and shall play many tunes in that key, for the banjo is but a lowly instrument and must needfully be retuned every time there is a key change.
IX Thou shalt speak gentle words of encouragement to those nourished on the milk of bluegrass music, but not the meat, lest a harsh word turn one again to the darkness that is pop music.
X Thou shalt not, by thyself, commence noodling off on a tune that the other musicians knoweth not, unless asked or unless thou art teaching that tune for this is an abomination, and the other musicians shall not hold thee blameless, and shall strike thee from their computer lists, yea, unto the third and fourth generation. - Author Unknown
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
number 8........ what's going on? i've never seen a banjo needing to be re-tuned. the guy at my local session is happy in all keys, even if i do a song in Ab!
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I know there are a couple a points that could be corrected, but its not my creation, i just found it and posted it!..
I dont understand no IX. anyone got a clue.
And thou art correct about the tuner, but come on its worth a laugh.
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Verbose, yet at times necessarry to be comprehensive. Well done, jig!
Our Session, which should be heaven, ITM is thy name.
Thy fiddles come, thy pipedrones hum, From Juneau to Sidney to Dublin.
Give us this evening our digital tuners, and forgive us our clinkers, as we forgive those who 'clinker" our favorites.
And lead us not into "Progressive" but deliver us from saxophones.
For thine is the Harmony, the Comaradery, and the Frivolity,
At least until "closing time",
Amen.
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
While I have practically no session experience worth speaking of and bearing in mind that I am in favour of articles regarding session etiquette (I'm fairly meek and well mannered, but I would probably have rather p*ssed off people at the first session I attended had I not read up on it beforehand), I'd like to caution any would-be sessioneers passing by that this particular set of commandments is (I hope) intended as a bit of a joke.
Numbers 1 to 5, fair enough. numbers 6 7 and 10 are just the kind of thing that someone who actually believes sessions have *rules* might take to heart in a kind of suprematist "this is what it all should be about" way.
And for <insert deity>'s sake, adding 'th' at the end of every word to simulate "ye oulde Englishe" is depressing, even in jest.
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I can explain VIII and IX. This was apparently written for American Olde Tyme, and then slightly modified to apply to sessions. VIII refers to 5-string banjos, which, in olde tyme music, use many different tunings, and often must be retuned during a key change. IX refers to the phenomenon of bluegrass musicians often having difficulty adjusting to olde tyme (and vice-versa).
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I refer the Honourable Gentleman to my posting of March 14th, 2006, "Rules of this Session", although this did provoke some controversy, some young lad claiming he had the copyrite.
This does raise a curious problem; if Henry VIII wrote it, he gets the royalties, yes, but if God wrote it, does he get the deities ?
the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
with thanks to chiddler, who provided this ;
I Thou shalt not come to the session to impresseth others with thine own talent for this is an abomination. The music shall be the star around which all musicians rotateth and not viceth-verseth! Attempts to make thine own star shine, shall surely lead thee into darkness!
II Thou shalt not forsake the beat. Thou shalt not speed up nor slow down accidentally when playing a tune for this shall be considered an abomination.
III Thou shalt arrange thyself in a small circle so that thou mayest see and mayest hear all the other musicians. Thou shalt listen with thine ears to the tunes and shall attempt to play in one accord with the group. Also, thou shalt lift up thine eyes to look about thee, lest there be some visual sign that someone endeavoureth to render unto thee.
IV Thou shalt play softly when someone lifteth his voice in song, when the guitar taketh a break, and when thou knowest not what thou art doing.
V Thou shalt play in tune! Tune thine instrument well and tune it often with thine electric tuner lest the sound that emanateth from thine instrument be unclean!
VI Thou shalt commence and cease playing each tune as one, so that the noise you make be a joyful noise and is not an abomination. Whensoever a musician sticketh forth his foot, as though he were afflicted with a cramp in the fatted calf, thou must complete the rest of that verse and then cease. Thou shalt stick out thine own foot or else lift up thy voice, crying, "This is it!" or "Last time!" if thou hast been the one to begin the tune and it hath been played sufficient times over. If the one who beginneth a tune, endeth it not by one of these signs, then the music goeth on in repetitious fashion until the listeners shall say, "Hark, it all soundeth the same!"
VII Thou shalt concentrate and shalt not confound the music by mixing up the "A" part with the "B" part. Most songs, but not all, proceedeth by the ancient law: "AABB". But, if thou sinneth in this regard or make any mistake that is unclean, thou mayest atone not by stopping, nay, but by reentering the tune at the proper place and playing on. Thy fellow musicians will support thee in this regard.
VIII Thou shalt be ever mindful of the key that the banjo is tuned in, and shall play many tunes in that key, for the banjo is but a lowly instrument and must needfully be retuned every time there is a key change.
IX Thou shalt speak gentle words of encouragement to those nourished on the milk of bluegrass music, but not the meat, lest a harsh word turn one again to the darkness that is pop music.
X Thou shalt not, by thyself, commence noodling off on a tune that the other musicians knoweth not, unless asked or unless thou art teaching that tune for this is an abomination, and the other musicians shall not hold thee blameless, and shall strike thee from their computer lists, yea, unto the third and fourth generation. - Author Unknown
well thats it.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by jig
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Jeremy can now close this website. All has been said. No more rancor, no more questions, complaints, compliments, or other trivia!
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by jtrout
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
number 8........ what's going on? i've never seen a banjo needing to be re-tuned. the guy at my local session is happy in all keys, even if i do a song in Ab!
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by Daniel Gott
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
He banjoeth not.
My tongue hurts from reading that.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by sbhikes
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Hey Jig, suddenly your Italian? "Commandaments"
Ah Fageddabowdit ! Chuna boiya!
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by chuneboi slim
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Think you need to fine tune no.V
I thought the idea was to try and play in tune with those around you, not a feckin electric gadget!
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by the wounded hussar
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I know there are a couple a points that could be corrected, but its not my creation, i just found it and posted it!..
.
I dont understand no IX. anyone got a clue.
And thou art correct about the tuner, but come on its worth a laugh
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by jig
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Verbose, yet at times necessarry to be comprehensive. Well done, jig!
Our Session, which should be heaven, ITM is thy name.
Thy fiddles come, thy pipedrones hum, From Juneau to Sidney to Dublin.
Give us this evening our digital tuners, and forgive us our clinkers, as we forgive those who 'clinker" our favorites.
And lead us not into "Progressive" but deliver us from saxophones.
For thine is the Harmony, the Comaradery, and the Frivolity,
At least until "closing time",
Amen.
Happy Samhain, all.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by Rook
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I beleive #9 has something to do with John Lennon.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by Bodhi
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
While I have practically no session experience worth speaking of and bearing in mind that I am in favour of articles regarding session etiquette (I'm fairly meek and well mannered, but I would probably have rather p*ssed off people at the first session I attended had I not read up on it beforehand), I'd like to caution any would-be sessioneers passing by that this particular set of commandments is (I hope) intended as a bit of a joke.
Numbers 1 to 5, fair enough. numbers 6 7 and 10 are just the kind of thing that someone who actually believes sessions have *rules* might take to heart in a kind of suprematist "this is what it all should be about" way.
And for <insert deity>'s sake, adding 'th' at the end of every word to simulate "ye oulde Englishe" is depressing, even in jest.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by Tirno
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I can explain VIII and IX. This was apparently written for American Olde Tyme, and then slightly modified to apply to sessions. VIII refers to 5-string banjos, which, in olde tyme music, use many different tunings, and often must be retuned during a key change. IX refers to the phenomenon of bluegrass musicians often having difficulty adjusting to olde tyme (and vice-versa).
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by uncledelphi
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
VI - not needed? Three times through, or twice if more than two parts.
# Posted on October 31st 2007 by mehere
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
I refer the Honourable Gentleman to my posting of March 14th, 2006, "Rules of this Session", although this did provoke some controversy, some young lad claiming he had the copyrite.
This does raise a curious problem; if Henry VIII wrote it, he gets the royalties, yes, but if God wrote it, does he get the deities ?
# Posted on November 1st 2007 by Guernsey Pete
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Hmmm...it's just like the actual 10 Commandments (no offense, jig):
It's a political document artificially inflated to sell better, with spooky language designed to scare and control primitive people.
There need only be one Commandment:
I Thou shalt always be observant of common consideration for other people, and you'll be fine.
Thanks to George Carlin.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCz0-HY1TLU
# Posted on November 1st 2007 by grymater
Re: the ten commandaments of sessions(with apologies to the Old Testament)
Thou shalt not covert thy neighbours Jeffries C/G.
# Posted on November 4th 2007 by geoffwright