Haven't posted here in a long while! But I just had to share my story and sentiments. Last night at weekly session I was asked to leave because my mini skirt was too short and too revealing. I was an out-of-town visitor just dropping in for a few tunes at the local Irish pub. What I thought was going to be a lovely evening of tunes and banter turned into a very embarrassing situation.
I remember one time this very curvy young lady in a strap-less white sequence dress sat at the session table and was enjoying the tunes. She would tap her fingernails on the table along with the beat, and every now and then would stand and do a very sultry hootchie dance as she rotated slowly. Of course no one asked her to leave since she wasn't taking anyone's seat. We found her to be quite entertaining actually.
But one of the musicians present that fateful night was a priest from Ireland who I know well, and when the lady stood up his eyes would become as wide as tea saucers. As our hootchie dancer bumped and grinded to the music while rotating slowly it was obvious that even though she had plenty to hold it up, her dress seemed to be slipping down a tiny bit with each bump -- and she wasn't bothering to do anything about it. Our musical priest had his eyes firmly fixed on the problem and he was closely monitoring the progress. Every now and then he would glance over and notice that I was aware of his rapt attention on the situation, and he would start laughing hysterically.
Well... this went on for some time and I'm sorry to say that the dress never fell low enough to be considered illegal. But our musical priest didn't return for quite a long spell after that night and I began to wonder what became of him. (He did live out of town and had to travel a good distance to get to our sessions.) But when he finally did show up again we were all very happy to see him. I had forgotten all about that night of the hootchie dancer, but our musical priest did lean over at one point and ask me if the young girl in the white sequence dress ever returned. I told him we hadn't seen her since, and he replied, "That was the best session ever!"
Anyway... tiny fiddler, I'm not comparing you to the girl in that anecdote, your thread just reminded me about this incident. You're very welcome at our session any time, and as you can see -- we can handle any dress code.
Jack! What is a 'sequence dress'??? I have a mental picture of one of those pieces of clothing that dancers wear that allow them to rip off portions dramatically as the tango (or pole dance or session, as the case may be) heats up.
Wait. I get it. Could we be talking about SEQUINS???? Those sparkly things that hootchie dancers (and country music stars) sprinkle liberally about their clothing?
Well, the temprature in London has finally climbed to 25 degrees Celsius again, almost too hot for a session ! And why couldn't it be like that when I was on my holiday ? ( Though it was quite nice for Towersey . )
Oh, sorry, but to get back to the original question.........I've never known anything like that at our sessions - not even had a priest there.....
Reminds me of Teada's first tour... I was doing the sound for them at the Plough and while we were setting up these three beautiful gals dressed to the nines happened to be walking by the pub and came in just to use the ladies toilet, (we never have babes like that in the pub for the music.) The door to the ladies toilet was situated where they had to pass right by the stage. They created quite a stir as they passed by and flirted briefly with the lads who all got worked into a lather. While they were in the ladies I said to the lads, "Fellas... calm down now... you realize where you are right?" Oisin said, "yea... San Francisco." I said, "That's right... those ladies that just walked by.... they come in here all the time -- they're actually fellas." The look of disappointment was palpable. When the ladies came back out the lads were sort of cool to them and the ladies left never to return. The lads were ready to lynch me after I told them I was only joking.
To return to the original story. You got what you deserved.
Irish music is for good holy Catholic ex convent school girls, otherwise known as comely maidens, who would never insult the music by wearing skimpy clothes, like a dirty little trollop.
Next time go to Llig or Will's session. They are so intent on the music that they never notice anything else, so the same problem would not arise.
This would never have happened before that Gay Byrne ruined the whole country.
Tinyfiddler, I think someone had a particularly troublesome bug up a certain part of their anatomy.
Whoever asked you to leave or whispered about the offending skirt was projecting their own ***p onto you. You're not responsible for their fantasies, uncomfortable feelings, what have you; high time they figured out that they are. Unless the session was held in a mosque, church, synagogue or courtroom where such clothing is definitely not appropriate, their discomfort was their problem. They had no business treating you badly because of this problem.
Was it the leader who asked you to leave or was it the consensus of the majority of the players that you be ejected? If so, well, their loss. I'm just wondering whether it was some immature, frustrated little weasel (hey, that is a LOT politer than what I originally wrote) acting on his own, in which case you might not really have needed to leave at all.
That's it... tell me where this session is, tinyfiddler, I'm going to go in my micro-mini and fishnets -- we'll see if they have the balls to ask me to leave.
I did a concert with a cellist who wore a tight black, short skirt - it was so tight that she had to be virtually lifted on to the stage because she couldn't get up the steps and she then carefully placed her cello while hitching the skirt up to what would have been an indecent position without the cello being there!!
What was the sequins of events after?
Was there a wee man with a green jacket with gold braiding?
Oh you were sitting on his head thinking he was a stool?
Oh he didn't like it?
He looked up and shouted you to leave?
Fish shop?
This thread confirm one thing Michael has been known to bang on about- the music is far too easy for most of you (thus leaving time for looking around and worrying about things like mini-skirts while playing).
On the other hand it gives the lie to his claim that woolly liberals and middle-of-the-roadists rule the roost in sessions- at least wherever the (alleged) incident is reported to have taken place.
Thirdly, it reveals a worrying number of male perverts contibuting to this site- *you know who you are*- should be ashamed of yourselves.
Fourthly, since reading all this stuff, I am having immense difficulty concentrating on my arpeggios.
One of those beautiful moments in Irish music when a stunning lady walks in to the pub with a fiddle and joins in .....It has brought out some of my best playing..........................
"Best Session Ever" indeed. Great story Phantom B!
...and with apologies to certain residents of your city, there's nothing wrong as far as I can see if tinyfiddler was a dude. I mean, as long as you're dressed legally and the landlord won't get in trouble, who the heck cares what you're wearing as long as you want to play some tunes? "Sit down! Wanna start a set there miss...er, sir...er...eh, yeah! So play us a tune there! Whatcha drinkin'?"
Thanks SWFL and Ailin. It's a true story that took place in the mid 90s. I couldn't mention the priest's name or even where he comes from in Ireland in an international forum like this of course, but those of us who were regulars back then will know whom I'm referring to. He's a lovely flute player and a lovely person as well, and we only wish he were coming regularly now as he did in those days.
I was playing a session in Long Beach a few months where as far as I can tell the entire cast of a gonzo porno video photo shoot came in to have a few beers after a day of filming. I was playing the pipes, right in the middle of a set of reels, I looked up to see one of the gals (quite a good looking girl) squatting on the patio spread eagled and, well, relieving herself right on the slate floor with another gal rubbing her shoulders. It was quite an interesting afternoon, needless to say...
Perhaps tinyfiddler was asked to leave because she was out of tune, her G-string being so tight that it was causing a lot of tension and disharmony .
Anyway I don't think its appropriate to wear short dresses at trad music sessions.
I was in a flute workshop one summer and a young lady was wearing hot pants and a low cut top. She was hanging out so far, I couldn't take my eyes off her flute-keys and | went home with embedded images of the parabolic reflections of my own eyes - not very nice to waken up to at three in the morning or to see before you while you drive at 95mph on a backroad!
I never learned a Goddamn tune the whole week.
Too hot for the session
Too hot for the session
Hiya,
Haven't posted here in a long while! But I just had to share my story and sentiments. Last night at weekly session I was asked to leave because my mini skirt was too short and too revealing. I was an out-of-town visitor just dropping in for a few tunes at the local Irish pub. What I thought was going to be a lovely evening of tunes and banter turned into a very embarrassing situation.
Has this ever happened to anyone?
Yours truly,
Tiny
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by tinyfiddler
Re: Too hot for the session
Why? Are you a guy?
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by SWFL Fiddler
Re: Too hot for the session
I mean, I'm shocked. Really? When lovely ladies come into pubs in America, normally we ask them to sit in our laps.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by SWFL Fiddler
Re: Too hot for the session
you are welcome at our session anytime!
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by maze
Re: Too hot for the session
Best Session Ever!
I remember one time this very curvy young lady in a strap-less white sequence dress sat at the session table and was enjoying the tunes. She would tap her fingernails on the table along with the beat, and every now and then would stand and do a very sultry hootchie dance as she rotated slowly. Of course no one asked her to leave since she wasn't taking anyone's seat. We found her to be quite entertaining actually.
But one of the musicians present that fateful night was a priest from Ireland who I know well, and when the lady stood up his eyes would become as wide as tea saucers. As our hootchie dancer bumped and grinded to the music while rotating slowly it was obvious that even though she had plenty to hold it up, her dress seemed to be slipping down a tiny bit with each bump -- and she wasn't bothering to do anything about it. Our musical priest had his eyes firmly fixed on the problem and he was closely monitoring the progress. Every now and then he would glance over and notice that I was aware of his rapt attention on the situation, and he would start laughing hysterically.
Well... this went on for some time and I'm sorry to say that the dress never fell low enough to be considered illegal. But our musical priest didn't return for quite a long spell after that night and I began to wonder what became of him. (He did live out of town and had to travel a good distance to get to our sessions.) But when he finally did show up again we were all very happy to see him. I had forgotten all about that night of the hootchie dancer, but our musical priest did lean over at one point and ask me if the young girl in the white sequence dress ever returned. I told him we hadn't seen her since, and he replied, "That was the best session ever!"
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
Anyway... tiny fiddler, I'm not comparing you to the girl in that anecdote, your thread just reminded me about this incident. You're very welcome at our session any time, and as you can see -- we can handle any dress code.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
Was this session in Afghanistan?
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by drone
Re: Too hot for the session
LOL - SWFL you crack me up me dude. And THIS thread is clearly a wind-up.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Jusa Nutter Eejit
Re: Too hot for the session
Jack! What is a 'sequence dress'??? I have a mental picture of one of those pieces of clothing that dancers wear that allow them to rip off portions dramatically as the tango (or pole dance or session, as the case may be) heats up.
Inquiring minds want to know.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Michele Sims
Re: Too hot for the session
Phantom - Great story, well told!
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Ailin
Re: Too hot for the session
Michele they really must let you out of the nunnery more often.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by ain't fluffed
Re: Too hot for the session
Wait. I get it. Could we be talking about SEQUINS???? Those sparkly things that hootchie dancers (and country music stars) sprinkle liberally about their clothing?
We don't wear things like that in MY convent.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Michele Sims
Re: Too hot for the session
CNN story:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2007/09/07/costello.mini.skirt.cnn
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Char B
Re: Too hot for the session
And, I suppose, thus spoiling the fun
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Char B
Re: Too hot for the session
Hahaha... yes batlady -- "SEQUINS" It's pretty obvious I don't get out much I guess.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
At least not wearing sequins.....
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Michele Sims
Re: Too hot for the session
At least the sessions at the Plough are in sequence.
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
You mean that you never get disorderly?
# Posted on September 7th 2007 by Michele Sims
Re: Too hot for the session
Well, the temprature in London has finally climbed to 25 degrees Celsius again, almost too hot for a session ! And why couldn't it be like that when I was on my holiday ? ( Though it was quite nice for Towersey . )
Oh, sorry, but to get back to the original question.........I've never known anything like that at our sessions - not even had a priest there.....
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Guernsey Pete
Re: Too hot for the session
It might have been a religious experience.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
You weren't playing the cello, I hope? Because I would have hate to have missed that.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
er...would hate to have missed that...
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
No, I was playing concertina actually.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
I meant the lady with the revealing mini skirt
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
What if I had a sequins dress on?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
Hey Phantom. Would you mind retelling that story only a bit slower.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by chuneboi slim
Re: Too hot for the session
Phantom, you scare me a bit. And you totally ruined my mini-skirt-cellist fantasy.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
Were all the others naked?
Was the priest there?
Who asked you to leave?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by doggone
Re: Too hot for the session
Was it a Comhaltas session?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by doggone
Re: Too hot for the session
So a guy with a beard walks into a bar in a sequined dress... He's carrying a concertina...
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Reverend
Re: Too hot for the session
That's how you know you're at a session in San Francisco.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
Nah, real transvestites shave their faces. A man with a beard wearing a dress is something to worry about.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
Reminds me of Teada's first tour... I was doing the sound for them at the Plough and while we were setting up these three beautiful gals dressed to the nines happened to be walking by the pub and came in just to use the ladies toilet, (we never have babes like that in the pub for the music.) The door to the ladies toilet was situated where they had to pass right by the stage. They created quite a stir as they passed by and flirted briefly with the lads who all got worked into a lather. While they were in the ladies I said to the lads, "Fellas... calm down now... you realize where you are right?" Oisin said, "yea... San Francisco." I said, "That's right... those ladies that just walked by.... they come in here all the time -- they're actually fellas." The look of disappointment was palpable. When the ladies came back out the lads were sort of cool to them and the ladies left never to return. The lads were ready to lynch me after I told them I was only joking.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
To return to the original story. You got what you deserved.
Irish music is for good holy Catholic ex convent school girls, otherwise known as comely maidens, who would never insult the music by wearing skimpy clothes, like a dirty little trollop.
Next time go to Llig or Will's session. They are so intent on the music that they never notice anything else, so the same problem would not arise.
This would never have happened before that Gay Byrne ruined the whole country.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by bodhran bliss
Re: Too hot for the session
Tinyfiddler, I think someone had a particularly troublesome bug up a certain part of their anatomy.
Whoever asked you to leave or whispered about the offending skirt was projecting their own ***p onto you. You're not responsible for their fantasies, uncomfortable feelings, what have you; high time they figured out that they are. Unless the session was held in a mosque, church, synagogue or courtroom where such clothing is definitely not appropriate, their discomfort was their problem. They had no business treating you badly because of this problem.
Was it the leader who asked you to leave or was it the consensus of the majority of the players that you be ejected? If so, well, their loss. I'm just wondering whether it was some immature, frustrated little weasel (hey, that is a LOT politer than what I originally wrote) acting on his own, in which case you might not really have needed to leave at all.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by cathrynb
Re: Too hot for the session
That's it... tell me where this session is, tinyfiddler, I'm going to go in my micro-mini and fishnets -- we'll see if they have the balls to ask me to leave.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
Cathryn, Immature, frustrated weasels have feelings too you know!
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by chuneboi slim
Re: Too hot for the session
Phantom, I think we should have an SF Bay Area contingent storm this session -- dressed like Halloween on Castro Street.
That'll teach 'em.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by cathrynb
Re: Too hot for the session
See - I can't see the problem. If they were offended by the mini-skirt, why didn't they just ask you to take it off?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by ethical blend
Re: Too hot for the session
Something about cellists and mini-skirts makes me think of cellulite.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by nicholas
Re: Too hot for the session
I did a concert with a cellist who wore a tight black, short skirt - it was so tight that she had to be virtually lifted on to the stage because she couldn't get up the steps and she then carefully placed her cello while hitching the skirt up to what would have been an indecent position without the cello being there!!
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Tarrantella
Re: Too hot for the session
Damned cello!
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
I agree with Ben -- she probably would have looked better without the mini skirt.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
What colour of underwear were you wearing?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by doggone
Re: Too hot for the session
What was the sequins of events after?
Was there a wee man with a green jacket with gold braiding?
Oh you were sitting on his head thinking he was a stool?
Oh he didn't like it?
He looked up and shouted you to leave?
Fish shop?
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by doggone
Re: Too hot for the session
This thread confirm one thing Michael has been known to bang on about- the music is far too easy for most of you (thus leaving time for looking around and worrying about things like mini-skirts while playing).
On the other hand it gives the lie to his claim that woolly liberals and middle-of-the-roadists rule the roost in sessions- at least wherever the (alleged) incident is reported to have taken place.
Thirdly, it reveals a worrying number of male perverts contibuting to this site- *you know who you are*- should be ashamed of yourselves.
Fourthly, since reading all this stuff, I am having immense difficulty concentrating on my arpeggios.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Too hot for the session
One of those beautiful moments in Irish music when a stunning lady walks in to the pub with a fiddle and joins in .....It has brought out some of my best playing..........................
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Saint
Re: Too hot for the session
Someone must play the rake, Jusa Nutter, right?
"Best Session Ever" indeed. Great story Phantom B!
...and with apologies to certain residents of your city, there's nothing wrong as far as I can see if tinyfiddler was a dude. I mean, as long as you're dressed legally and the landlord won't get in trouble, who the heck cares what you're wearing as long as you want to play some tunes? "Sit down! Wanna start a set there miss...er, sir...er...eh, yeah! So play us a tune there! Whatcha drinkin'?"
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by SWFL Fiddler
Re: Too hot for the session
Don't play "My darlings a sheep" whatever you do.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by geoffwright
Re: Too hot for the session
Thanks SWFL and Ailin. It's a true story that took place in the mid 90s. I couldn't mention the priest's name or even where he comes from in Ireland in an international forum like this of course, but those of us who were regulars back then will know whom I'm referring to. He's a lovely flute player and a lovely person as well, and we only wish he were coming regularly now as he did in those days.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Phantom Button
Re: Too hot for the session
I was playing a session in Long Beach a few months where as far as I can tell the entire cast of a gonzo porno video photo shoot came in to have a few beers after a day of filming. I was playing the pipes, right in the middle of a set of reels, I looked up to see one of the gals (quite a good looking girl) squatting on the patio spread eagled and, well, relieving herself right on the slate floor with another gal rubbing her shoulders. It was quite an interesting afternoon, needless to say...
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by Michael Eskin
Re: Too hot for the session
Out of the two I think I'd opt for the Frisco session Michael.
T'would be a brutal sight that one.
# Posted on September 8th 2007 by chuneboi slim
Re: Too hot for the session
I'm finding it hard to reconcile the images of 'squatting' with being 'spreadeagled' ...
... and it's ***king with my head ...
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by ethical blend
Re: Too hot for the session
What's that sound? Oh, it's this thread splashing squarely into the gutter. Yay! Ugh. Oh well.
It was fun while it lasted. When "squatting" and "spreadeagled" get used in the same sentence, the end is near.
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by Marklar
Re: Too hot for the session
Perhaps tinyfiddler was asked to leave because she was out of tune, her G-string being so tight that it was causing a lot of tension and disharmony .
Anyway I don't think its appropriate to wear short dresses at trad music sessions.
I was in a flute workshop one summer and a young lady was wearing hot pants and a low cut top. She was hanging out so far, I couldn't take my eyes off her flute-keys and | went home with embedded images of the parabolic reflections of my own eyes - not very nice to waken up to at three in the morning or to see before you while you drive at 95mph on a backroad!
I never learned a Goddamn tune the whole week.
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by doggone
Re: Too hot for the session
Flute-keys, eh? Never heard them called that before.
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Too hot for the session
It's a bar for pete's sake, not a church...
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by Red Crow
Re: Too hot for the session
If the thought of viewing a young lady's anatomy disturbs you, the answer is simple. Be a gentleman - don't look. Avert your gaze.
# Posted on September 9th 2007 by Rudall the time
Re: Too hot for the session
Not at all disturbing. It was very enjoyable - that was the problem!
# Posted on September 21st 2007 by doggone