To counter the deplorable rash of recent posts banging on about fun and enjoyment in the music, here is an altogether more sober scenario.
Your three (OK, four) score years and ten are up, and your loved ones are gathered round, hoping to catch one last pearl- the distillation of all those years spent scraping, plonking or wheezing for your art. (They are also hoping it will be short enough to be carved economically on your headstone, and not make the family into a laughing stock- but that is the least of your worries.)
You prop yourself on one elbow, and look wisely into the distance, remembering that 'I told you I was ill' has already been taken. This is, almost certainly, your last chance to make your mark, and to hand down something decent.
What will it be?
How about singing:
Oh beat the drums slowly and play the fife lowly;
Sing the Death March as you carry me along.
Take me to the valley, there lay the sod o'er me,
I'm a young cowboy and know I´ve done wrong
Fifes can't be played lowly though - Wikepedia says they can be heard miles away through artillery fire.
A number years ago, enough ago that my children were not even teenagers yet, whilst on a walk through the woods we came upon a small late 18th, early 19th century family grave yard. We started reading the epitaphs and when a fit of laughter took over we came up with this one for my marker:
Jazz drummer, Buddy Rich's reported last words are a personal favourite. While lying in bed in hospital a nurse asked if anything was bothering him. He replied, "Yeah! Country Music!"
Karl Marx - "Go on, get out - last words are for fools who haven't said enough."
Goodbye, Dow, BB, Bliss, Ceolachan, Steve Shaw, Bellman, Key Maniac and the rest of you. I love you all. My time here is finished. I leave in peace in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit..................................
I've been trying to follow what's been going on
You confuse me by saying that it's all gone wrong
So there's walls coming down all over the place,
Well, maybe putting them there was our first mistake
For the eggs to hatch the shell must break
Don't count the chickens too soon!
I see no cause for alarm
No reason to get downhearted
They're trying to say our time is past
Hell, it hasn't even started!
I believe that love is still the finest power
It's a beacon shining in the midnight hour
It burns inside and it's burning still
They haven't killed it and they never will
Gonna run to the top of the nearest hill
And dance till the sun comes up
I've got my eyes fixed tight on the road ahead
Pay no heed to the things being said
Look at who's saying them, scratch my head
Get back to the business of life
I believe that love is still the finest power
It's a beacon shining in the midnight hour
It burns inside and it's burning still
They haven't killed it and they never will
Gonna run to the top of the nearest hill
And dance till the sun comes up
As Johnny o'Leary tells it, Padraig o'Keefe's last words were rather frustrating. Something to the effect of, "You know what's awesome? Rolling in the Ryegrass and Miss McLeod's. Oh, but you're playing Miss McLeod's backwards. Too bad you're never gonna understand what the feck I mean by that."
Famous Last Words
Famous Last Words
To counter the deplorable rash of recent posts banging on about fun and enjoyment in the music, here is an altogether more sober scenario.
Your three (OK, four) score years and ten are up, and your loved ones are gathered round, hoping to catch one last pearl- the distillation of all those years spent scraping, plonking or wheezing for your art. (They are also hoping it will be short enough to be carved economically on your headstone, and not make the family into a laughing stock- but that is the least of your worries.)
You prop yourself on one elbow, and look wisely into the distance, remembering that 'I told you I was ill' has already been taken. This is, almost certainly, your last chance to make your mark, and to hand down something decent.
What will it be?
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Famous Last Words
Would you mind taking your foot off the oxygen tu.............
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Geoff Pollitt
Re: Famous Last Words
"Hup!"
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by robharper
Re: Famous Last Words
"Just don't sing Danny Boy!"
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by RockyRoader
Re: Famous Last Words
How about singing:
Oh beat the drums slowly and play the fife lowly;
Sing the Death March as you carry me along.
Take me to the valley, there lay the sod o'er me,
I'm a young cowboy and know I´ve done wrong
Fifes can't be played lowly though - Wikepedia says they can be heard miles away through artillery fire.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by RichardB
Re: Famous Last Words
A number years ago, enough ago that my children were not even teenagers yet, whilst on a walk through the woods we came upon a small late 18th, early 19th century family grave yard. We started reading the epitaphs and when a fit of laughter took over we came up with this one for my marker:
Here lies Ed, he’s dead!
Peace,
Ed
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by ejsant
Re: Famous Last Words
To Be Continued.....................
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Greg the Piano Tuner
Re: Famous Last Words
Here, the composer.
No longer posing.
Now, I'm supposing,
just decomposing.
Once, he composed.
Now -- compost.
Go thou and do likewise.
Good luck.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Piece
Re: Famous Last Words
The Spike Milligan's epitaph is up near the top of the list: "I told you I was ill."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Trevor Jennings
Re: Famous Last Words
oops! should have been "The late Spike Miligan's ..."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Trevor Jennings
Re: Famous Last Words
And I got that wrong as well - "The late Spike Milligan's..."
It was a good session last night
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Trevor Jennings
Re: Famous Last Words
Feck! Arse! Girrrls! Dhhhrrrink!
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Conán McDonnell
Re: Famous Last Words
playing in tune at last
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by the wounded hussar
Re: Famous Last Words
Jazz drummer, Buddy Rich's reported last words are a personal favourite. While lying in bed in hospital a nurse asked if anything was bothering him. He replied, "Yeah! Country Music!"
Karl Marx - "Go on, get out - last words are for fools who haven't said enough."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Libertango
Re: Famous Last Words
How about Richard Harris? When being stretchered out of the hotel he was living in he cried out very loudly - "It was the SOUP!"
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by ceoltoir2010
Re: Famous Last Words
"Argh....*gasp*...Michael...uh....was right...."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Steve Shaw
Re: Famous Last Words
As Ned Kelly was led to the gallows he said:
"Such is life."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Clear Drops
Re: Famous Last Words
"Longevity is over-rated"
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by feardearg
Re: Famous Last Words
Brendan Behan, being nursed by a nun,
"God Bless you Sister, may you be the mother of a Bishop."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by ...
Re: Famous Last Words
I've had this conversation with my friends often and after a lot of thought there's only one thing that I would say and have on my tombstone:
She had a good time.
Mary
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Antikhntr
Re: Famous Last Words
Leave loons alone because crazy's contageous and you don't want to get sick.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by pastrings
Re: Famous Last Words
Oscar Wilde, looking at the walllpaper in his bedroom,
"One of us has to go."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by ...
Re: Famous Last Words
"Don't start the polkas until you're absolutely sure I'm gone."
or:
"I'm done? Unleash the accordions then."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Will Harmon
Re: Famous Last Words
Goodbye, Dow, BB, Bliss, Ceolachan, Steve Shaw, Bellman, Key Maniac and the rest of you. I love you all. My time here is finished. I leave in peace in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit..................................
# Posted on April 29th 2007 by portnabpucai
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Finbar Saunders2
Re: Famous Last Words
Some goodies:
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist—"
—U.S. Army General John Sedgwick, hit by a Confederate sniper's bullet, 1864
"Sixty-four thousand, nine hundred and twenty-eight."
—Neal Cassady, according to the Mexicans who found him beside the tracks, counting rail ties
"Buy my t-shirt to, like, impress the dumb chicks, college dudes."
—Che Guevara
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by NEW Pure Drop® Ear Canal Oil
Re: Famous Last Words
And the poignant one:
"I must go in, for the fog is rising."
—Emily Dickinson
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by NEW Pure Drop® Ear Canal Oil
Re: Famous Last Words
Apologies to Dick Gaughan
& No Cause For Alarm
I've been trying to follow what's been going on
You confuse me by saying that it's all gone wrong
So there's walls coming down all over the place,
Well, maybe putting them there was our first mistake
For the eggs to hatch the shell must break
Don't count the chickens too soon!
I see no cause for alarm
No reason to get downhearted
They're trying to say our time is past
Hell, it hasn't even started!
I believe that love is still the finest power
It's a beacon shining in the midnight hour
It burns inside and it's burning still
They haven't killed it and they never will
Gonna run to the top of the nearest hill
And dance till the sun comes up
I've got my eyes fixed tight on the road ahead
Pay no heed to the things being said
Look at who's saying them, scratch my head
Get back to the business of life
I believe that love is still the finest power
It's a beacon shining in the midnight hour
It burns inside and it's burning still
They haven't killed it and they never will
Gonna run to the top of the nearest hill
And dance till the sun comes up
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Ben Steen
Re: Famous Last Words
Whaddya mean there's no B music?- I *ALWAYS* come in on the B music.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Famous Last Words
"The Bucks, then, is it?"
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Will Harmon
Re: Famous Last Words
Feck it's a bus la....
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by bowburner
Re: Famous Last Words
Dose anyone like bodhrans?
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by bowburner
Re: Famous Last Words
You may be six foot four, weigh twenty stone and have a black belt in karate but you're still a b****y useless bodhrán player ...
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Bannerman
Re: Famous Last Words
"This pigeon . . . has fallen . . . off the . . . gate . . ."
or
"Rose—in the heather—bud . . ." and then I'd drop the snowglobe
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by NEW Pure Drop® Ear Canal Oil
Re: Famous Last Words
"He chased that gander into one too many praetie holes..."
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by SWFL Fiddler
Re: Famous Last Words
Hold my beer and watch this.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Hanley
Re: Famous Last Words
"I'm feeling a little better" - Brigham Young
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by feardearg
Re: Famous Last Words
As Johnny o'Leary tells it, Padraig o'Keefe's last words were rather frustrating. Something to the effect of, "You know what's awesome? Rolling in the Ryegrass and Miss McLeod's. Oh, but you're playing Miss McLeod's backwards. Too bad you're never gonna understand what the feck I mean by that."
--DtM
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Dan the Man
Re: Famous Last Words
"Hey guys! I brought my bugle"!
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by feardearg
Re: Famous Last Words
I'm not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Ailin
Re: Famous Last Words
And just as I was beginning to get the hang of it...
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Famous Last Words
"I forgot to make a will".
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by bodhran bliss
Re: Famous Last Words
You forgot to make a will? Read my lips. I do not want your bodhran.
# Posted on May 1st 2007 by Steve Shaw
Re: Famous Last Words
If a John Lennon guitar can sell for thousands, my bodhran...........
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by bodhran bliss
Re: Famous Last Words
...can annoy thousands.
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by Steve Shaw
Re: Famous Last Words
The news of my death has been grossly exaggerated.
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by morning star
Re: Famous Last Words
"Either this wallpaper goes, or I do."
Oscar Wilde, that.
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by ceemonster
Re: Famous Last Words
This could be my Last Post, but then again...
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by Here Lyeth
Re: Famous Last Words
Any room for a Djembe, lads?
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by RockyRoader
Re: Famous Last Words
beep beep beeeeeep!
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by TOMMYB
Re: Famous Last Words
To continue with my musical Journey
`Beatboxing` for Beginners
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by pkev
Re: Famous Last Words
Miserable Git epitaph
`It's about time I Coffed up`
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by pkev
Re: Famous Last Words
Let's all play Tam L ...
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by ethical blend
Re: Famous Last Words
What the f**k was that !! The mayor of Hiroshima
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by southpaw
Re: Famous Last Words
You don't have to listen, you just need to read the dots.......No Llig!...No!..............gasp....splat!
# Posted on May 2nd 2007 by bowburner
Re: Famous Last Words
"Now I want something decent played at my funeral - Foster & Allen, Kenny Rogers, Mull Of Kintyre - none of that diddly-diddly stuff..!"
# Posted on May 3rd 2007 by nicholas
Re: Famous Last Words
Hey Tansey, your flute's out of tune ....
# Posted on May 3rd 2007 by Bannerman
Re: Famous Last Words
Aaaargh
# Posted on May 4th 2007 by Clear Drops
Re: luddite last words
'can you keep a secret?...so can i'
said by a dying luddite to a clergyman who was attempting to get the names of his comrades.
# Posted on May 4th 2007 by biggus dave
Re: Famous Last Words
On the tombstone of a dulcimer player. . .
He died hammered.
# Posted on May 6th 2007 by jrathbun
Re: Famous Last Words
On the tombstone of a fiddler:
Scroll down ...
geddit??!?
# Posted on May 6th 2007 by ethical blend
Re: Famous Last Words
OUT!
# Posted on May 7th 2007 by Here Lyeth