Browsing youtube I found a perfectly decent session ruin by a tambourine and some castanet type things. Every second session I find on youtube seems to be ruined by people hitting, shaking and clacking things. How many sessions round the globe have been knackered by this type of thing?
Personal favourite hates that I've had the misfortune to play through have been the hitting coins of a table and (believe it or not) someone playing a darbuka with drumsticks. Anyone else got any horrors to share? (and maybe drop a hint to perpetrators of these crimes)
Strangely enough I have been viewing a lot of ITM on YouTube.
What struck me was that in the absence of a bodhran melody players stamp their feet, play the side of the instrument, clap hands at stages, or in one instance we had a musician beating tiome to a fiddle by slapping his hand loudly with a flute.
I was doing a gig in rural denmark a few years ago when, during the half time break, one of the organisers appeared with a huge box of soup spoons and proceeded to hand out a pair to everyone in the place.
When we started the second set she stood at the front facing the audience and gave all 200 a spoons lesson along with our first set of tunes.
What a great night............How we laughed...........(sob!)
I play at a legion, which on session nights is populated by two disjoint groups: 1) musicians, and 2) totally drunk people over the age of 70. (In the latter category, an elderly woman who approached me one night to effuse over my playing, and tell me that the young soloist she'd seen playing "Mozart or Beethoven or something" on the violin at the symphony the other night reminded her of me. Um...thanks, I think.)
We have a few spoons players. One occasionally dances around the musicians' section accompanying us. Far more bizarre, though, was the rather drunk/stoned middle-aged woman who sat down at our table one evening with her instrument in hand. We'd taken an extended break from playing, and were chatting about whatnot for a spell. After a few minutes of this, our accompanist grew impatient, and loudly cleared her throat. "Excuse me, I have SPOONS," she proclaimed. "You can start playing again."
I went up to Kincardine (Ontario - on the shore of Lake Huron) for a session at the local bar/restaraunt/gas station/grocery (they're all in one building - it's not a big place) about a year ago. The owner brought out his snare drum. How do you tell the owner he can't play? I wonder if that session still goes ...
the thing about people who "ruin" sessions is that they have no idea that they are ruining them ... most of them think, at the very least that they're joining in with some brilliantly ancient democratic arts process, and at the worst that they're adding something brilliant because they've understood what it's all about. They often spend time later laughing at how others mess up sessions. Myself I've caused no end of havoc. All over the place.
at sligo live this year, there was a fantasic session in rendevouz with mike mcgoldrick, liz carroll, cathy jordan amongst other. was nearly ruined by some1 in the bar tapping two euro coins off a glass. sooooo annoying!
A very happy and enthusiastic lady wielding a guitar covered in "Jesus Loves You" and "Are You Born Again Too?" stickers once threatened to take over a session I was listening to in Doolin years ago. She had been waiting very eagerly for a chance to "join in", and when the lads took a break off she went like a horse at the gate with a seemingly endless succession of twee Christian songs. Needless to say, nobody was converted that night.
Was playing a gig in a South London Irish pub some years ago. The Irish Guv' brought an elderly gentleman up to the stage and said "This man wants to join in with his bodhran play some reels for him" He half lifted him, half pushed him up on to the stage which was about five foot high. The 'Gentleman' set about the bodhran as if he was trying to kill it. I think it was the late Seamus Ennis I saw doing something similar. I turned around to ask him to keep it down a bit as we couldn't hear ourselves playing. He stepped back and fell off the stage breaking his arm. Shame really as he was just getting into the music........I have to admit that the tears ran down my legs at the time.
Playing a session in O'Donoghues in Aberdeen and some old guy started trying to sing "I wish I was in Carrickfergus". We let him sing it once. He then asked us to play it... ...after a number of persistant requests we relented and played the air of it. Then, about 15 minutes later, standing up at the bar, he fills his Barrel chest with air and launches into.....
..... "I wish I was in Carrickfergus"*(*^(%*^
We stopped him right smart with a unison: "WE WISH YOU WERE TOO"!!
It shut him up fast... ...no need to be like that lads, I was just leaving....
Once had a man roll out a velvet clothe and methodically select some shiney sliced deer antlers and clacked them unceasingly.... he put them away... mulled over the velvet, selected some nicely polished bones and clacked them unceasingly.... he put them away ... mulled over the velvet, pulled out two sparkling spoons and clacked them unceasingly...... you get the idea.... and it was a large piece of velvet!!
Ahhh a specialist......!
"I play at a legion"
What's that, Tall, Dark, and Mysterious? Like, the French Foreign Legion?
"We have a few spoons players"
Consider yourself lucky that the session organizer doesn't do anything like that!
I was at a session once and after every set some stout fella in the audience would ask if we knew Danny Boy. Personally, I don't care for it and steered the music elsewhere. He finally said, "Surely ye know it. It goes like this...&c." I had no choice but to politely listen. After he finished, I told him it was nice but I'd never heard it before. I asked him where he was from and he said Londonderry. I told him I'd never heard of IT either! I don't think he ever caught on, but at least he left.
However, these Congolese drummers played with a good deal more restraint and less volume than your average bodhran basher.
The piper and the fiddlers selected some simpler sparsely-noted tunes so the drummers could get a groove going, they listened carefully and played along for a few tunes and did a couple of songs of their own and it was the opposite of a "wrecked" session
I went to the Ennis Tradfest last weekend, I called into Custy's Music shop I was shocked to see that he was selling shakey eggs and shakey fruit. You would think he'd know better, the mind boggles.
We have played at quite a number of "twee, Christian" events, which are not obviously dry, but when all the punters turn the label of their "non-alcoholic wine" towards the band, you get the hint.
It spoiled it one night, when I got my bag of cans out, the drummer produced a hipflask of the craitur, then two more of the band appeared worse for wear from their earlier gig.
They were the punters who specifically asked if we had any women in the band - gender-mix and all that rubbish, which we had, but found the request a little odd as it seemed to be one of those, how shall I say (without any disrespect), "posh-area whites-only" house-churches.
A couple came in from Newfoundland on their way to festival out west and stopped into our regular Thursday night session. They proceeded to take out a set of spoons, joined at the hip, which they claim to have patented. After ploughing into the tunes with such disregard for the music that even the least discerning punters were drawn to comment they managed to send every attending musician to the bar leaving them alone in the corner at which point they unpacked a suitcase to reveal a makeshift booth containing dozens of sets of afore mentioned spoons. They then proceeded to sell them, commenting all the time about what a great session this was.
in my teens in Miltown Malbay a mighty session, with some very famous names, was belting away in Fahy's bar when this crusty fella arsed his way onto a stool between the fiddler and the concertina player clutching what looked like a bodhran case. The musicians were quite accomodating and even chatted and laughed with this 20 something English chap. When the musicians started up again, said crusty unzipped his case to the approving nod of the kind fiddler only to produce a rolled up length of 'hoover' tube which he began to blow into while twirling the thing above his head. Two local punters at the bar, without interupting their banter, each grabed him by the armpit and "oxter cogged" him, as we say up north, out the door. They were quite efficient at this, as if they did it frequently, and resumed sipping their pints and listening to the fine music.
This summer I did a weekend workshop for "Celtic Ensemble" - hey! they were paying me... Given the, umm, disparate talents of the students, I usually get them playing a couple of tunes and find a couple of songs we can arrange. One guy wanted badly to sing Carrickfergus. Except that he insisted on singing "Carrick-EY fergus", which made me smirk heartily. I debated telling him, but eventually decided he'd be more entertaining for the rest of you in his original unspoiled state. So if he shows up at your session wearing a kilt, tam (please check for swords) and offering to sing Carrick-eyfergus, it's all my fault.
Bren, that is fascinating. I've found that to be true as well. Twice now I've had percussionists from other musical forms sit in at our session with all manner of drums, and they are so respectful. They listen carefully, they play subtly, they are just wonderful. One fellow was on the djembe, he was from a progressive rock band. He had a great time and played very well. Then, we had a chap from a local Cuban band come and he was just as respectful and tasteful.
Interesting that usually the percussion wreckers are not really drummers or percussionists...I guess that's the problem.
Does anyone who was floating around Galway Town in the mid nineties remember a crusty encampment up the New Line in Kinvara ? There was a character called "Pete Bog" (I kid you not) from up there who used to turn up to sessions with a bodhran and a slinky tube curled inside it so that he could get both percussion and dijeridu "sounds" and procede to dance around with all the bells and ribbons etc flying out of the hair and landing in fellas pints and everything.
@patkiwi - Did those spoons players do good trade, then?
I think we should be told. Come a recession, wrecking a session and selling spoons to browbeaten punters might be a useful skill to have, and achieve the redistribution of a little wealth.
As I recall (a limited capacity these days) I think they did manage sell a few sets, mind you they had the whole pub to themselves. I don't know if they were sympathy purchases though.
Two weeks ago I got stuck between the spoons and the shaky egg/bongos/bodhran. They were both reasonably good percussionists but it was somewhat unnerving.
Patkiwi -- I remember. And remember Simon (I think) with the ENOURMOUS drum and ancient sax/didge thingy? Not that the two are really comparable, just funny things from that time. I remember a session in one particular tourist-packed pub on a sticky summer night with me, a box player, and four bodhrans. And none of them could play (or speak english.)
Around thye same time, an offensive spoons player sitting at the bar was sent a bowl of soup, compliments of the musicians.
"Interesting that usually the percussion wreckers are not really drummers or percussionists...I guess that's the problem."
I tend to agree, SWFL.
The one or two really good percussionists that I've known personally can make a good rhythm on just about anything. They don't need velvet rolls, fancy drums and endless different tippers. As I've said before, I played offshore with one such from a very musical Co.Limerick family who got a great rhythm with two Biros on the edge of our cabin desk. Maybe the music doesn't "need" that but it was much better than me playing on my own!
Even when Evelyn Glennie sat in on a local session with a pair of bones she kept it pretty sparse.
Years ago I asked a session group at a tourist hotspot hotel in Killarney if they would mind if I sat in. With a pause.. they said um, what do you play? That goat drum with the stick .. The collective look was PRICELESS! They were still there when I got back , fortunate for them I don't play the drum.
I cannot confirm or dismiss the theory.
But one night someone made a comment after a rather long version of 'Brian Boru's March' ~ "Now there is a tune you could beat out on a couple of rocks with some stout sticks."
How about Fields of Athenry, played trash-metal-acoustic style on a badly tuned guitar with an equally badly tuned voice. To make it worse the offender had hand painted his guitar a vivid green and wore a flamboyant and highly colourful set of clothes so that we couldn't get away from the disaster even with fingers in our ears. How we loved the encore - Green Fields of France. The easy way out was "over the top" for us all.
A few weeks ago one of our session regulars, an elderly Irish gentleman, sang to us, as he usually once every session. Now, he is recovering from major surgery and so his voice is understandably quiet and a little fragile. This didn't prevent a guy who has recently discovered this particular session from hammering away on his bodhran loudly enough to obliterate the singer.
Two weeks later, another of our session regulars, a lady with an exceptionally clear, controlled and accurate voice (must be professionally trained), sang an Irish ballad a cappella. When she sings, her voice invariably hushes the noisiest pub. Again, this didn't prevent our man from trying to ruin it, this time by loudly "singing" along and demonstrating to all and sundry that he is evidently more tone-deaf than my dog. Fortunately, the singer had the professional control to be able to ignore the unwanted "contribution".
Last Sunday in Queens New York a potentially mighty session with two very good fiddlers , an impressive piper and an excellent flute player whose flute was just a bit too quiet was destroyed by a bongo drum player who, while probably technically proficient, might as well have been playing the jackhammer. Unfortunately he seemed to know most of the people there and bopped around with unusual confidence. To their credit, the actual musicians seemed to be ok with it.
taurus, its a music shop, if someone wants to buy a shaky egg for use in a school, or any other of those weird instruments that anyone can play than why shud we begrudge them. its not his fault if they buy it to play in a session.
I have on quite a few occasions played a session with a rather old fiddler player. He seems to know all the bad singers in the pub, and while he is still trying to tune the fiddle at the begining of the session and before a tune is played, has been known to shout out at one of them. " Howya Mick are you going to give us a song?" I often say "Of course he's going give us a song..... Our problem will be trying to stop him"
Bodhran Bliss wrote:
"Strangely enough I have been viewing a lot of ITM on YouTube.
What struck me was that in the absence of a bodhran melody players stamp their feet, play the side of the instrument, clap hands at stages, or in one instance we had a musician beating tiome to a fiddle by slapping his hand loudly with a flute."
People celebrate in a huge variety of demonstrative ways
There are many examples I can think of but this incident which I originally posted some four years ago is the best I've ever come across.
"Last night a non-playing visitor arrived at the session. At first it seemed he had a healthy interest in the proceedings as he listened attentively to a couple of sets. He then proceeded to join the session group and started a conversation with a fiddle player pouring out his heart on why he never became a virtuoso himself. Once we started our next set he started to clap loudly and give the occasional hug to our female box player. When the set finished he gave her a kiss on the cheek to express his appreciation. As you can imagine she was not too happy with this unsolicited act and when I felt that "enough is enough" and that some action was required he conveniently headed for the bar.
Everything then was OK until the singer was asked for a song. As is normal we can expect a bit of quiet for this but our visitor didn't notice and carried on talking loudly even after calls of "cúinas" (not sure about the spelling) from most people in the bar. The final and perhaps funniest thing was when a ballad singer (Luke Kelly style) at the bar burst into song. Our friend immediately went silent and proceeded to the bar giving the singer a big hug for the duration of the song. In fairness to the singer he seemed oblivious to this and continued with the song much to his credit and the amusement of the audience.
All we can hope for is that this visitor was just passing through and will not grace us with his presence in future. However, has anyone any ideas on how you can handle such an individual in a session situation?"
As it transpired the offender probably was just passing through and thankfully never returned to our session.
Even more ways to ruin a session
Even more ways to ruin a session
Browsing youtube I found a perfectly decent session ruin by a tambourine and some castanet type things. Every second session I find on youtube seems to be ruined by people hitting, shaking and clacking things. How many sessions round the globe have been knackered by this type of thing?
Personal favourite hates that I've had the misfortune to play through have been the hitting coins of a table and (believe it or not) someone playing a darbuka with drumsticks. Anyone else got any horrors to share? (and maybe drop a hint to perpetrators of these crimes)
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by bogman
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
The perpetrators aren't here. They don't check out these pages for hints on developing their spoons virtuosity!
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by RichardB
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Sure, let's sing "Black Velvet Band" another FIFTY THOUSAND M@#%&*!^+$ING TIMES!!!! : P
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by Seosamh Ui Sinan
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
'Every second session I find on youtube seems to be ruined . . .' The doctor recommends lowering the YouTube dosage. ;)
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by Ben Steen
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
The worst offender I've ever had in any session I've ever attended was a lady who used to bring belly-dancer finger-cymbals.
The brassy "clash*ty-clang-clang-clash*ty-clang" of these horrific things was like having an ice-pick jabbed deep into your brain through your ear.
Luckily, she and her husband moved back to England ... I hope she never invades one of your sessions!
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by KeepFiddlin'
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Really? We had a lively belly dancer who came twice at our session. Fun craic!
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by Ben Steen
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
But Random, youtube is a grrrreat place to learn tunes (not off the session clips of course, that's just nosiness)
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by bogman
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Good stuff for sure; Transatlantic sessions, RTE Full Set, Phil & Johnny . . . O.k. double the dosage.
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by Ben Steen
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Coins on a pint glass
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by I ♥ Dow
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Even worse - some ****in EEJIT getting two empty pint glasses and bashing them together..
I'm not a violent man, but...
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by Joe CSS
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Strangely enough I have been viewing a lot of ITM on YouTube.
What struck me was that in the absence of a bodhran melody players stamp their feet, play the side of the instrument, clap hands at stages, or in one instance we had a musician beating tiome to a fiddle by slapping his hand loudly with a flute.
Thank Allah for bodhrans.
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by bodhran bliss
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
The worst offender I've ever had in any session I've ever attended was a lady who used to bring belly-dancer finger-cymbals.
The brassy "clash*ty-clang-clang-clash*ty-clang" of these horrific things was like having an ice-pick jabbed deep into your brain through your ear.
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by KeepFiddlin'
That's my wife. You want to see her dancing!
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by bodhran bliss
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I was doing a gig in rural denmark a few years ago when, during the half time break, one of the organisers appeared with a huge box of soup spoons and proceeded to hand out a pair to everyone in the place.
When we started the second set she stood at the front facing the audience and gave all 200 a spoons lesson along with our first set of tunes.
What a great night............How we laughed...........(sob!)
# Posted on November 13th 2008 by banjoburger
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I play at a legion, which on session nights is populated by two disjoint groups: 1) musicians, and 2) totally drunk people over the age of 70. (In the latter category, an elderly woman who approached me one night to effuse over my playing, and tell me that the young soloist she'd seen playing "Mozart or Beethoven or something" on the violin at the symphony the other night reminded her of me. Um...thanks, I think.)
We have a few spoons players. One occasionally dances around the musicians' section accompanying us. Far more bizarre, though, was the rather drunk/stoned middle-aged woman who sat down at our table one evening with her instrument in hand. We'd taken an extended break from playing, and were chatting about whatnot for a spell. After a few minutes of this, our accompanist grew impatient, and loudly cleared her throat. "Excuse me, I have SPOONS," she proclaimed. "You can start playing again."
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Tall, Dark, and Mysterious
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I went up to Kincardine (Ontario - on the shore of Lake Huron) for a session at the local bar/restaraunt/gas station/grocery (they're all in one building - it's not a big place) about a year ago. The owner brought out his snare drum. How do you tell the owner he can't play? I wonder if that session still goes ...
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by dlkes
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
the thing about people who "ruin" sessions is that they have no idea that they are ruining them ... most of them think, at the very least that they're joining in with some brilliantly ancient democratic arts process, and at the worst that they're adding something brilliant because they've understood what it's all about. They often spend time later laughing at how others mess up sessions. Myself I've caused no end of havoc. All over the place.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by pavlf
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
at sligo live this year, there was a fantasic session in rendevouz with mike mcgoldrick, liz carroll, cathy jordan amongst other. was nearly ruined by some1 in the bar tapping two euro coins off a glass. sooooo annoying!
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by irishtradguy
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
A very happy and enthusiastic lady wielding a guitar covered in "Jesus Loves You" and "Are You Born Again Too?" stickers once threatened to take over a session I was listening to in Doolin years ago. She had been waiting very eagerly for a chance to "join in", and when the lads took a break off she went like a horse at the gate with a seemingly endless succession of twee Christian songs. Needless to say, nobody was converted that night.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by bindicat
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Was playing a gig in a South London Irish pub some years ago. The Irish Guv' brought an elderly gentleman up to the stage and said "This man wants to join in with his bodhran play some reels for him" He half lifted him, half pushed him up on to the stage which was about five foot high. The 'Gentleman' set about the bodhran as if he was trying to kill it. I think it was the late Seamus Ennis I saw doing something similar. I turned around to ask him to keep it down a bit as we couldn't hear ourselves playing. He stepped back and fell off the stage breaking his arm. Shame really as he was just getting into the music........I have to admit that the tears ran down my legs at the time.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Free Reed
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
..so the only thing he wrecked was himself? Good man.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by pavlf
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Percussion can make or brake a session.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by pipersgrip
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Playing a session in O'Donoghues in Aberdeen and some old guy started trying to sing "I wish I was in Carrickfergus". We let him sing it once. He then asked us to play it... ...after a number of persistant requests we relented and played the air of it. Then, about 15 minutes later, standing up at the bar, he fills his Barrel chest with air and launches into.....
..... "I wish I was in Carrickfergus"*(*^(%*^
We stopped him right smart with a unison: "WE WISH YOU WERE TOO"!!
It shut him up fast... ...no need to be like that lads, I was just leaving....
...ah.... ...a tune at last.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Jamie
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
PS We wish everyone in Carrickfergus well for the moment this old soap arrives...
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Jamie
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Once had a man roll out a velvet clothe and methodically select some shiney sliced deer antlers and clacked them unceasingly.... he put them away... mulled over the velvet, selected some nicely polished bones and clacked them unceasingly.... he put them away ... mulled over the velvet, pulled out two sparkling spoons and clacked them unceasingly...... you get the idea.... and it was a large piece of velvet!!
Ahhh a specialist......!
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Silver Spire
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
"I play at a legion"
What's that, Tall, Dark, and Mysterious? Like, the French Foreign Legion?
"We have a few spoons players"
Consider yourself lucky that the session organizer doesn't do anything like that!
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by oldstrings
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I was at a session once and after every set some stout fella in the audience would ask if we knew Danny Boy. Personally, I don't care for it and steered the music elsewhere. He finally said, "Surely ye know it. It goes like this...&c." I had no choice but to politely listen. After he finished, I told him it was nice but I'd never heard it before. I asked him where he was from and he said Londonderry. I told him I'd never heard of IT either! I don't think he ever caught on, but at least he left.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by croi
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
You might think that this looks like a bit of a nightmare:(sorry for the long link)
http://lh5.ggpht.com/_Wxxw7ysLVc8/SO5iq_J3RfI/AAAAAAAABNU/8ffCG63RvdU/s800/21092008015.jpg
However, these Congolese drummers played with a good deal more restraint and less volume than your average bodhran basher.
The piper and the fiddlers selected some simpler sparsely-noted tunes so the drummers could get a groove going, they listened carefully and played along for a few tunes and did a couple of songs of their own and it was the opposite of a "wrecked" session
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Bren
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I went to the Ennis Tradfest last weekend, I called into Custy's Music shop I was shocked to see that he was selling shakey eggs and shakey fruit. You would think he'd know better, the mind boggles.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Taurus
Re: Spoiling a dry gig
We have played at quite a number of "twee, Christian" events, which are not obviously dry, but when all the punters turn the label of their "non-alcoholic wine" towards the band, you get the hint.
It spoiled it one night, when I got my bag of cans out, the drummer produced a hipflask of the craitur, then two more of the band appeared worse for wear from their earlier gig.
They were the punters who specifically asked if we had any women in the band - gender-mix and all that rubbish, which we had, but found the request a little odd as it seemed to be one of those, how shall I say (without any disrespect), "posh-area whites-only" house-churches.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by geoffwright
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Crikey geof, what a night mare. But why no disrespect? Surly they deserve disrespect?
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by ...
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
A couple came in from Newfoundland on their way to festival out west and stopped into our regular Thursday night session. They proceeded to take out a set of spoons, joined at the hip, which they claim to have patented. After ploughing into the tunes with such disregard for the music that even the least discerning punters were drawn to comment they managed to send every attending musician to the bar leaving them alone in the corner at which point they unpacked a suitcase to reveal a makeshift booth containing dozens of sets of afore mentioned spoons. They then proceeded to sell them, commenting all the time about what a great session this was.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Patkiwi
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
in my teens in Miltown Malbay a mighty session, with some very famous names, was belting away in Fahy's bar when this crusty fella arsed his way onto a stool between the fiddler and the concertina player clutching what looked like a bodhran case. The musicians were quite accomodating and even chatted and laughed with this 20 something English chap. When the musicians started up again, said crusty unzipped his case to the approving nod of the kind fiddler only to produce a rolled up length of 'hoover' tube which he began to blow into while twirling the thing above his head. Two local punters at the bar, without interupting their banter, each grabed him by the armpit and "oxter cogged" him, as we say up north, out the door. They were quite efficient at this, as if they did it frequently, and resumed sipping their pints and listening to the fine music.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by iwerzon
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
This summer I did a weekend workshop for "Celtic Ensemble" - hey! they were paying me... Given the, umm, disparate talents of the students, I usually get them playing a couple of tunes and find a couple of songs we can arrange. One guy wanted badly to sing Carrickfergus. Except that he insisted on singing "Carrick-EY fergus", which made me smirk heartily. I debated telling him, but eventually decided he'd be more entertaining for the rest of you in his original unspoiled state. So if he shows up at your session wearing a kilt, tam (please check for swords) and offering to sing Carrick-eyfergus, it's all my fault.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Gzeg
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Bren, that is fascinating. I've found that to be true as well. Twice now I've had percussionists from other musical forms sit in at our session with all manner of drums, and they are so respectful. They listen carefully, they play subtly, they are just wonderful. One fellow was on the djembe, he was from a progressive rock band. He had a great time and played very well. Then, we had a chap from a local Cuban band come and he was just as respectful and tasteful.
Interesting that usually the percussion wreckers are not really drummers or percussionists...I guess that's the problem.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by SWFL Fiddler
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Does anyone who was floating around Galway Town in the mid nineties remember a crusty encampment up the New Line in Kinvara ? There was a character called "Pete Bog" (I kid you not) from up there who used to turn up to sessions with a bodhran and a slinky tube curled inside it so that he could get both percussion and dijeridu "sounds" and procede to dance around with all the bells and ribbons etc flying out of the hair and landing in fellas pints and everything.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Patkiwi
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
@patkiwi - Did those spoons players do good trade, then?
I think we should be told. Come a recession, wrecking a session and selling spoons to browbeaten punters might be a useful skill to have, and achieve the redistribution of a little wealth.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by nicholas
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
As I recall (a limited capacity these days) I think they did manage sell a few sets, mind you they had the whole pub to themselves. I don't know if they were sympathy purchases though.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Patkiwi
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I do patkiwi, sounds hilarious!
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by piobagusfidil
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Two weeks ago I got stuck between the spoons and the shaky egg/bongos/bodhran. They were both reasonably good percussionists but it was somewhat unnerving.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by kuec
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Patkiwi -- I remember. And remember Simon (I think) with the ENOURMOUS drum and ancient sax/didge thingy? Not that the two are really comparable, just funny things from that time. I remember a session in one particular tourist-packed pub on a sticky summer night with me, a box player, and four bodhrans. And none of them could play (or speak english.)
Around thye same time, an offensive spoons player sitting at the bar was sent a bowl of soup, compliments of the musicians.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Chrishty
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
"Interesting that usually the percussion wreckers are not really drummers or percussionists...I guess that's the problem."
I tend to agree, SWFL.
The one or two really good percussionists that I've known personally can make a good rhythm on just about anything. They don't need velvet rolls, fancy drums and endless different tippers. As I've said before, I played offshore with one such from a very musical Co.Limerick family who got a great rhythm with two Biros on the edge of our cabin desk. Maybe the music doesn't "need" that but it was much better than me playing on my own!
Even when Evelyn Glennie sat in on a local session with a pair of bones she kept it pretty sparse.
# Posted on November 14th 2008 by Bren
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Some of these stories are enough to make your blood turn cold!
# Posted on November 15th 2008 by bb
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Years ago I asked a session group at a tourist hotspot hotel in Killarney if they would mind if I sat in. With a pause.. they said um, what do you play? That goat drum with the stick .. The collective look was PRICELESS! They were still there when I got back , fortunate for them I don't play the drum.
# Posted on November 15th 2008 by lamh trom
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
@Chrishty,
Simon Dwyer it was. His theory was that the bodhran was the basis for all Irish music.
# Posted on November 15th 2008 by Patkiwi
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I cannot confirm or dismiss the theory.
But one night someone made a comment after a rather long version of 'Brian Boru's March' ~ "Now there is a tune you could beat out on a couple of rocks with some stout sticks."
# Posted on November 15th 2008 by Ben Steen
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
How about Fields of Athenry, played trash-metal-acoustic style on a badly tuned guitar with an equally badly tuned voice. To make it worse the offender had hand painted his guitar a vivid green and wore a flamboyant and highly colourful set of clothes so that we couldn't get away from the disaster even with fingers in our ears. How we loved the encore - Green Fields of France. The easy way out was "over the top" for us all.
# Posted on November 16th 2008 by bigfish
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
A few weeks ago one of our session regulars, an elderly Irish gentleman, sang to us, as he usually once every session. Now, he is recovering from major surgery and so his voice is understandably quiet and a little fragile. This didn't prevent a guy who has recently discovered this particular session from hammering away on his bodhran loudly enough to obliterate the singer.
Two weeks later, another of our session regulars, a lady with an exceptionally clear, controlled and accurate voice (must be professionally trained), sang an Irish ballad a cappella. When she sings, her voice invariably hushes the noisiest pub. Again, this didn't prevent our man from trying to ruin it, this time by loudly "singing" along and demonstrating to all and sundry that he is evidently more tone-deaf than my dog. Fortunately, the singer had the professional control to be able to ignore the unwanted "contribution".
# Posted on November 16th 2008 by Trevor Jennings
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Last Sunday in Queens New York a potentially mighty session with two very good fiddlers , an impressive piper and an excellent flute player whose flute was just a bit too quiet was destroyed by a bongo drum player who, while probably technically proficient, might as well have been playing the jackhammer. Unfortunately he seemed to know most of the people there and bopped around with unusual confidence. To their credit, the actual musicians seemed to be ok with it.
# Posted on November 16th 2008 by Stuporman
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
taurus, its a music shop, if someone wants to buy a shaky egg for use in a school, or any other of those weird instruments that anyone can play than why shud we begrudge them. its not his fault if they buy it to play in a session.
# Posted on November 16th 2008 by tradmoosic
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
I have on quite a few occasions played a session with a rather old fiddler player. He seems to know all the bad singers in the pub, and while he is still trying to tune the fiddle at the begining of the session and before a tune is played, has been known to shout out at one of them. " Howya Mick are you going to give us a song?" I often say "Of course he's going give us a song..... Our problem will be trying to stop him"
# Posted on November 16th 2008 by Free Reed
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Bodhran Bliss wrote:
"Strangely enough I have been viewing a lot of ITM on YouTube.
What struck me was that in the absence of a bodhran melody players stamp their feet, play the side of the instrument, clap hands at stages, or in one instance we had a musician beating tiome to a fiddle by slapping his hand loudly with a flute."
People celebrate in a huge variety of demonstrative ways
- Chris
# Posted on November 17th 2008 by ramblingpitchfork
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
There are many examples I can think of but this incident which I originally posted some four years ago is the best I've ever come across.
"Last night a non-playing visitor arrived at the session. At first it seemed he had a healthy interest in the proceedings as he listened attentively to a couple of sets. He then proceeded to join the session group and started a conversation with a fiddle player pouring out his heart on why he never became a virtuoso himself. Once we started our next set he started to clap loudly and give the occasional hug to our female box player. When the set finished he gave her a kiss on the cheek to express his appreciation. As you can imagine she was not too happy with this unsolicited act and when I felt that "enough is enough" and that some action was required he conveniently headed for the bar.
Everything then was OK until the singer was asked for a song. As is normal we can expect a bit of quiet for this but our visitor didn't notice and carried on talking loudly even after calls of "cúinas" (not sure about the spelling) from most people in the bar. The final and perhaps funniest thing was when a ballad singer (Luke Kelly style) at the bar burst into song. Our friend immediately went silent and proceeded to the bar giving the singer a big hug for the duration of the song. In fairness to the singer he seemed oblivious to this and continued with the song much to his credit and the amusement of the audience.
All we can hope for is that this visitor was just passing through and will not grace us with his presence in future. However, has anyone any ideas on how you can handle such an individual in a session situation?"
As it transpired the offender probably was just passing through and thankfully never returned to our session.
# Posted on November 17th 2008 by Bannerman
Re: Even more ways to ruin a session
Having re-read the various contributions to that old 2004 thread, I think it's fairly relevant to this one and may be worth a view, particularly for anyone who wasn't on the Yellowboard at the time. the link is http://www.thesession.org/discussions/display/5340/comments#comment112678
# Posted on November 17th 2008 by Bannerman